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24 Years Young, Chronic Pain, Newly Antisocial.

Sep 04, 2014 11:27 AM

I used to be the life of the party, the upbeat, never have down time sort of gal. However, I suffered an accident when I was 21 (I'm now 24), and now I'm terribly antisocial. I used to love being around people, now I can't be in a crowd of more than 3 or 4 people. I was a social butterfly, but now I avoid people if they ask me to do something. Anyone else? And how do you beat it?

Sep 04, 2014 11:34 AM

Yes and haven't figured that one out myself yet lol

Sep 04, 2014 12:00 PM

Have you developed any irrational fears?

Sep 13, 2014 9:43 PM

I'm 23 with various conditions, all of which make me tired, grumpy and anti-social. age 14/15 I had 8 friends over most weekends for 'parties' and stuff but by age 18 I was like a hermit crab. never leaving my room, in bed all the time. Me, my bed, the TV and a stack of books. (how I managed to find myself my BF at age 16 and keep him even to this day I'll never know) I started having panic attacks earlier this year which is completely unlike me. I also panic when I'm out and there's too many people - shopping centres, parties, restaurants etc. I can't go out alone and a lot of the time I choose to stay in bed than go out even if I'm feeling up to it. I know lots of people our age with ME, fibromyalgia etc that are very similar. hope this helps and you feel more normal now ☺️ xxx

Sep 20, 2014 11:12 AM

Wow, hugely grateful to stumble over this topic! 26 going on 260 here. No longer able to cope with people, even friends. More general anxiety and anxiety attacks. Can't bear to leave the house if I can avoid it. I'm sadly lad there are others in the same boat, feel a little less like a neurotic fool. Hope things improve for you all :-)

Sep 20, 2014 4:03 PM

I've had nine back surgeries and two neck two knees surgeries I'm in pain daily yes I don't want to be bother with people or family but I have to push on even when it's hard to walk I've just been trusting in the Lord to carry me on and I've been bless to just to be here .

Sep 20, 2014 7:35 PM

snap - have to go to work though and be the boss. very very difficult. just want to hide away and CBA with anyone. except my wife and kids. 36 now and been going on in various forms since 11 yrs old. can stand large gatherings where I'm a focual point.

Sep 20, 2014 9:25 PM

I am naturally an introvert so I understand how you feel. However, I am wondering what changed your character?

Oct 03, 2014 6:15 AM

ive been suffering from chronic nerve pain for 10 years. I'm 36. I used to be the EXACT same way! The chronic pain caused depression and anxiety. if you haven't seen a psychologist or psychiatrist, I would recommend you do so. I waited to long and it got REALLY BAD!

Oct 03, 2014 8:00 AM

Musicman hit the nail on the head, with his observation regarding Depression and Anxiety. When you consider how stressed out our neurological systems are as a result of chronic pain, it is perfectly understandable that other aspects of our brain chemistry are adversely affected.

Depression and Anxiety are behavioural manifestations of Serotonin and Dopamine imbalances in the human brain. These conditions are bona ride disorders, with a well proven physical basis. Depression and Anxiety are NOT defects of character, and are nothing to be ashamed of. You CAN have your life back, if you choose to seek treatment. I have experienced this personally, and highly recommend that others take that leap of faith by speaking with your Doctor. If your Doctor dismisses or belittles your concerns, get a new Doctor. Please don't give up hope, life does not have to be a horrible, dark little room full of loneliness and misery. Pain, be it physical, emotional or spiritual, can be managed, and you can live a good fulfilling life. All you young people deserve to enjoy your time on this earth, so I encourage you to follow up on my suggestion. May you all enjoy a peaceful day.

Oct 04, 2014 5:54 AM

BBY, this is a textbook sign of depression. You may want to seek some professional help for your mental health. Your mental health is just as, if not more important than your physical health. Don't be embarrassed to seek mental health help.

Oct 10, 2014 9:06 PM

I am the same, I had even outed anything was wrong with me. I was passed from specialist to specialist with no awnsers and I was in a desperate place, luckily my friends, boyfriends, mum- she was a counsellor and advised I went to my uni's counselling services when it was laid out the depression came after the pain and it really helped me explain what I was suffering with. I also think I may have lays had fibro or even from a young age because depression comes in waves of decades, and I remember having this exactly 10 years ago. I have lost a lot of friend but I have my family and a handful of friends who are genuine and I would rather have that than all those fickle friends I used to have. stay strong xxx

Oct 11, 2014 1:45 AM

I'm 18 years old and I'm exactly the same. I don't leave the house most days and when I do I often have to sit in the car whilst my mum goes into a shop because I get such awful anxiety I feel like I'm going to cry, throw up and faint all at the same time. it's beyond awful and completely wrong for our ages to be so reclusive. sending you hugs hunny. always here if you want a chat xx

Oct 12, 2014 9:57 PM

I am 49 years old and up until I was 35 I was never home, always at social events, loved road trips and thought nothing of going out, coming home from the club, taking a shower and going to work. I was always on the go... loved weddings, barbecues, parties of any kind and the more people the better. I owned horses, had new cars, a great job and just had fun all the time. now, I'm in such agony all the time, I don't want to be bothered with much of anything. I don't like to be in crowds any more and don't attend parties (family or otherwise), and have lost all interest in the things that used to make me happy. I pray you find some relief and that you are able to rejoin your life again.

Oct 13, 2014 4:48 PM

Kathy, you sound like me. I was so active,, always on the go, work & busy enjoying life but now, my pain keeps me from most everything I enjoy. I'm even sick of hearing my phone ring, I just don't want to be bothered and have lost interest in things too. Theres got to be (I wish) that we could be free of our pains and enjoy life. Hurting 24/7 sucks:-( and no one really understands and then family puts such demands on me, well it's too much. No one understands like those of us on this forum do. I do feel truly blessed I came across this app!

Oct 15, 2014 12:45 PM

I couldn't be happier that I found this app. To be able to communicate with people who actually get it. people can't understand why I don't want to be around large groups of people (even family) and why I don't go to parties or anything. it's all too much. I can't even make plans in advance because then I get sick with worry that I'm not going to be well enough instead of being happy that I have something to do with people who care about me. it's all very depressing. I wish you the very best and feel free to post to me any time... I am on here pretty often (2-3 times a week).

Oct 15, 2014 5:52 PM

I agree with everyone saying seek help. I'm on antidepressants because I have PTSD as well so the pain plus the emotional stuff gets overwhelming. I'm in the medical field also so having dark days is normal but more dark than not is not good. talk to somebody even if it's a pastor. good luck!

Oct 16, 2014 10:51 AM

@KathyA1965 - I feel your pain. Making plans for anything is difficult. Sometimes I am able to stick to them, but more often than not I end up canceling on people. Real friends understand and don't give you a ration of crap for being unreliable. It's why I can't hold down a job - I can't promise an employer that I'll be fit for work on any given day. It sucks, and the panic is as paralyzing as the depression. I was prescribed Xanax to help, and it can boost you quickly over a crying or panic episode. I try to honor my commitments and push through if I can, but sometimes it's better for everyone if I don't participate. Friends will understand and help you when they see you stumble -- otherwise, they are not friends. This disease sure helps weed out the pretenders! Good luck and keep your head up.

Oct 18, 2014 12:05 PM

I understand completely. I'm only 43, but I feel like 85 most days. Going through medical hell can do that to you. Dealing with chronic pain is debilitating in a way that no one but fellow sufferers can truly understand. One of the best thing to happen to me in a long, long time was finding a therapist who specializes in working with people who have CP or illnesses. Finding a pain doctor willing to actually treat my pain as much as possible was the other. He put in a morphine pump in July, which also helped tremendously. It should've been done years ago.

My friends and family are very supportive. They understand that there are times when I have to cancel plans, etc. It's so easy to isolate yourself when things get bad. Sometimes I have to force myself to pick up the phone and connect, or go out, even when I'm feeling pretty good. I'm usually glad I did in the long run.

I hope you find healing, both mental and physical. It's so hard to be young and feel so old.

Oct 19, 2014 12:41 AM

I am now 27 got chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia at 15, still have chronic pain every day. certain environments can just get too overwhelming. when you're in so much pain and things you're around or are doing exacerbate that pain and discomfort that makes you too miserable to enjoy it. you need to figure out what you can and can't do while also trying to push yourself every once in a while to do a little more, get out, be around people. I have very few friends and have spent so much time isolated. that plus ongoing pain is enough to make anyone miserable and depressed. but in our quest to get better-feel better more often is the hope that our lives will get better.

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