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Another should I go ER...

Aug 22, 2015 6:35 PM

I'm sooooo tired, awake 50+ hours now......

My whole back is constantly spasming even taking my Valiums every 4 hours. Taking my morphine every 6 hours! My legs right now I can barely move it. It was all my own doing..I can't blame anyone but myself.

I've been stressed for a couple of weeks now, barely eating and sleeping for the past 2 weeks or so. I went to play soccer with some friends, and took a couple of tackles....the pitch was so dry that I've burnt 1/3 of my skins on my shins and a big patch on both elbows. Been going up there for daily dressing and the nurses has been asking how I am, I just say ok, even I'm not, I don't know why,

Well, after that stupid session I nearly passed out, I wasn't sure whether it was the prevention meds before playing sports or is it because I haven't done anything so physical for so long. After the session I went to ER had had to stay for 4 hours for drips and other stuff.

Just today, since the injury which was about 3+ days ago now, I can't sleep, I feel like a zombie.....right now my legs hurts so bad I can't move it, I'm not even sure how I can get myself to the ER. Wife is sleeping, it's about 6am now.......in so much pain and after taking so much meds I still can't get rid of it!!


Please have mercy...I promise I'll wear proper gear next time!!!!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Aug 22, 2015 7:41 PM

Oh no octobot! I am sorry you are in so much pain and not being able to sleep and stress just makes things worse.

If you've been physically idle for some time you have to work back into it easier... baby steps!! I can't tell you how many times I've done the same type of thing though. I used to say to myself omg will I ever learn!!! I didn't think i would but I figured it out eventually.

I hope you feel better soon!

Aug 22, 2015 10:40 PM

Thanks for your kind words Linda. The weather has changed drastically today. What can I do about it?

My knee joints hurts so bad i can barely focus on anything else. If I go ER and tell them my knee is hurting really bad due to weather they will seriously think I'm nuts or something similar.

The pain is literally unbearable!!! I want to just scream!!!!!!! So much on my plate as it is. Told the doctor I haven't been eating well and sleeping, all they said is they can't do anything for me...

Going to ER is no diff right now. All operated by the same doctors anyways. If only they can feel this pain right now!!!!

Sorry for my rant. I really feel I'm going into a state of depression that I won't be able to get out of anytime soon........

OOOOOOOOUUUUUUUCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Aug 22, 2015 10:51 PM

Octobot, I hate you are struggling so badly. Your body's pain is likely worse because of your lack of sleep. I can't believe the doctors won't give you anything to help you sleep. Have you tried taking an OTC product for pain & sleep combined like Tylenol PM, of Nyquil? The Tylenol is basically just Tylenol and benadryl ingredients together. I've said a prayer for you. The weather is hot here with high humidity. I'm thinking it's causing my hands and feet to hurt. I hope you can get some sleep and that your kind will reduce in pain levels. 🙏🌼

Aug 22, 2015 10:59 PM

Octobot, in sorry you are going through such a horrific time. If you can't get yourself to the ER and your wife is sleeping, call yourself an ambulance, leave her a note that you didn't want to disturb her and get yourself to the hospital. If you feel bad enough that you think you need to go than you should must've to your body. I hope they can help you get the pain relief and rest you need. The longer you go without any sleep, the more dangerous it is. Please take care of yourself and I'll be praying for you (And make sure to keep your promise of wearing the proper gear next time). I wish you all the best and have my fingers crossed that you can get some rest and the pain relief that you need so badly. 💕🙏🏻🌻

Aug 23, 2015 1:27 AM

Thanks flappy and alwayz, both of you have been very thoughtful. No point getting an ambulance. So tired of going to ER as our local doctors would be on call anyways. They know me very well there but they think I'm already having too much toxic meds so really wants me to wean off them. I don't mind having no meds as long as I'm not in pain. I've tried several times avoiding my daily intake of opiods, but it got much too painful to avoid them.

I have been taking my narcotic meds as recommended daily and honestly, I don't even feel any high from it anymore. I'm not sure why they would even think that I might be addicted to it. It gives me no high or loopy feelings at all.

I'm sure many of you understand what I mean when we genuine individuals with pain take such meds.

I've been on almost the same dose for nearly a month now. It worked great at first but I feel it's slowly tapering off its usefulness when I'm flaring.

I've never asked for a higher dose and probably won't get any too. I've tried pregbalin, some allergic meds that makes you sleepy. It didn't do much for me. Felt more nausea and sick than sleepy. Tried giving it a go several times and I just couldn't get use to it.

I'm lost with ideas. I lie in my bed and I'm either on my iPad or literally doing work. I tried reading, I tried counting sheeps too! Just the stress is really getting to me. I'm not even sure what else the doctors can give me at all. I've asked whether I could try patches, they said they won't let me try it because they can't control the dose. I accepted their explanation but still no plan for me. Sigh. Sorry for the rants today.

Many thanks for the prayers! I'm not one to pray in my spare time but I'll definitely be praying now for some relief if God can help me somehow.

Aug 23, 2015 3:19 AM

I have been in the same dosage of meds for about 5 years. The reason you don't get "high" is because the pain to drug ratio is higher. When you take opioid meds and your pain is low and the dose high, you get the euphoria, high, etc... If your pain level is higher than the amount of opioid you are taking, you don't get those effects, therefore no high, no addiction, etc.. This was explained to me by my pain management doctor. I also read it in medical journals. I can skip several doses of medication per day (sometimes ALL day) and not have an issue with wanting the drugs, just an extremely high pain level and then it takes a couple of doses at regular intervals to get the pain level back to a manageable point. It's extremely exhausting to have to live like this and the doctors who constantly want to lower our medication have no concept of what additional pain that this puts us in. If they had ONE pill that you could take ONCE a day and there was no pain, I'd throw away all the rest of the other meds I have and never look back. My pain management doctor told me on Monday that they are not even close to finding a solution for those of us who suffer with chronic, high level pain. I find that really sad since I've been like this for 22 years now. There is longevity in my family and being already in such pain and my joints and body failing, I don't want to live to be in my 90's. Although, if that's God's plan for me then I will be here trying to help others like me get through the bad days and offer whatever I can of myself to make others feel better. Perhaps that is my purpose in life, who knows. Until then, you'll always know where to find me if you need me to get through your day.💕🙏🏻🌻

Aug 24, 2015 4:41 AM

Finally passed out after dinner last night, slept for a few hours. Felt so much better than not sleeping.

Work is ever more stressing now. I'm just taking my meds on a daily basis now because I'm doing much more work than before and work for me now extends over 12 hrs of my day. This being a family business, I have to do all I can....

Pain level is not as high as the last couple of days.....manageable now....but somehow i feel the calm before the storm....it's slowly starting to ache amd stiffen up in my back area again. I'm running very low on my rescue pills, it's suppose to last me as needed 1 month, but due to amount of stress and injury I had, I've been taking them daily and now they last just over 2 weeks. Only have a few days of supplies left, if I go and see my doctor, I'm not sure what she will think of me. Sigh.

Going through a dangerous time where if they start labelling me as a drug seeker, I'm going to die of pain. If only they can just go through a day with me, through my work and home life, they would know I don't have that much of a life and the amount of pain we all go through doing nothing is so much of a nonsense.

Rant over! Glad I'm feeling slightly better than before when pain lvl would have been 9s....now at 7 I'm just happy.....funny huh, normal people would literally cry if their pain lvl is at a 7 the whole day.

Aug 24, 2015 8:05 AM

Octobot, one thing you have to remember is that we ARE normal people who just happen to live in chronic pain for one reason or another. If you need more meds, have someone go with you that works with you and can attest to the doctor that your job is very demanding and since you're working 12 hours you need your meds every day. That is not drug seeking. You're seeing a doctor for chronic pain and if he knows his stuff, he knows that pain changes and increases over time. Try not to get too stressed about it because that will cause your symptoms to be worse. You sure don't need that!!! I hope all goes well for you. Call your doctor, make an appointment and explain what is happening to you. I pray it all works out for you and I'm sending you some gentle hugs to get you through your day. 💕🙏🏻🌻

Aug 24, 2015 9:27 AM

Octobot, have you thought of wearing a body camera like those in the wilderness do, to video your day? That might help. 🙏🌼

Aug 24, 2015 9:28 AM

Flappsy... You have the best ideas!! I love it. There's nothing better than actual proof of what you're going through!!

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