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Chronic pain is sucking the life out of me

May 28, 2016 11:13 PM

I'm 27, female and I've been dealing with Endometriosis, Fibromyalgia for about 5-6 years or so, and clinical anxiety/depression all my life.

For a while I was doing okay, then my depression started seeping into everything in my life where I'm eating more to deal with my chronic pain. The frustration with my job and trying to find a new one to appease my body but cannot find one for the life of me. My family really believes I should be on disability but I'm not sure if I can. The state or federal government doesn't see Endometriosis as a disability, which is utterly disgusting.

I don't want to drive, I dont want to leave my house, I want to stay in bed where I know I feel safe and that's he first place I run to when I'm in serious pain. My anxiety has kicked into overdrive for the past year, and I feel like I totally lost myself.

I use to be on medication for depression but it made things way worse, and vowed to never ever go back on them, so that's not an option for me. I tried therapy but I've always been passed around because my insurance would only allow me to see certain people and they don't help me. So I feel helpless.

May 28, 2016 11:35 PM

Yes, chronic pain sucks. Hope you get some support and rest soon.

May 29, 2016 9:26 AM

Yes, chronic pain does tend to suck the life right out of a person. Hoping you get some help soon.

May 29, 2016 11:11 AM

There are many studied that show St. John's wort is as good as Prozac. It is worth a try

May 29, 2016 4:09 PM

Munchkin... I'm sending hugs. I don't have endometriosis. I can't relate to that pain. I have fibro, depression and anxiety. I take meds with little relief. I really want to quit taking it all, but what I'd it really works? What if I stop and gets worse? Oh the anxiety. I don't have any good advise. I hope you have some comfort in knowing that I support you. Be thankful that your family does as well. Be blessed.

May 29, 2016 9:45 PM

Munchkin, I've had depression, anxiety, & endometreosis since 1988. Fibromyalgia, hypothyroidism, and sjogrens were addressed over the past 9 years, along with many other issues. The absolute hardest to deal with have been the fibro & sjogrens, because they've turned my life upside down, inside out. They also triggered the depression & anxiety, which was under control without meds. I have many med allergies so I have to be careful what I take. Try some alternatives to help your symptoms, maybe with a homeopathic doc. Hugs & prayers as you try to find the best methods for coping! πŸ™‚πŸ’•πŸ™πŸŒΌ

Jun 27, 2016 6:03 AM

I have also had depression since childhood and have been on many meds for it. A couple of them made me suicidal, most did not work but right now I'm on a combination that keeps my chin above water. Don't give up, there are many options and You are important.

Jun 27, 2016 1:59 PM

Hi munchkin- I'm sorry you are feeling this way. I'm 26 and I've been dealing with undiagnosed chronic pain for the past 5 years. The last year has been the worst and I feel depression creeping up on me. I wrote a poem last night- it made me feel a little better. Try to find ways to express yourself. I'm a huge advocate for art therapy- music, writing, painting- something that keeps you occupied, even a coloring book helps me- if you can do those without pain. I know it's more than hard but don't give up on your body. Keep looking and searching, maybe you just haven't found the "right" therapist who can treat chronic pain. Take a look into dry needle therapy, it has helped me a lot. Sending you healing thoughts.

Jul 01, 2016 12:14 AM

Hugs. May I suggest trying different antidepressants, my doctor says different ones have different side effects for different people. I got lucky, the second one I tried really worked for me.

Jul 01, 2016 8:59 AM

Could you go on disability because of depression and anxiety. Would your insurance recognise that? Good luck. G

Jul 02, 2016 9:06 AM

I can relate to your situation and I want to advise to keep trying. If you give up you will be in bed all day, barely getting by on government support, always in pain. Depression will overwhelm you into thinking you're not good enough to be with anyone or work anywhere, and anxiety will keep you from trying to persist anyway. But you can overcome that with some strong self notivation, help from a chronic pain counselor, and support from people like us who understand what's going on. I think the hardest part is having a good support system because friends and family don't get it, and they either underestimate the pain or oversympathize and make me feel pathetic. Be on a schedule, find help, and don't give up.

Jul 03, 2016 12:58 AM

I was just thinking about you @munchkin07. How's it going?{{hugs}}

Jul 03, 2016 7:25 AM

Hope ur feeling better ...ur not alone πŸ€—

Jul 03, 2016 10:26 AM

I sure do understand. I hope that you have a better day and get some relief from your pain. It's a struggle. Take breaks when you can and make no apologies for it. Your body needs what it needs. Hang in there, your pain family is here!! {{{Hugs}}}πŸ’•πŸ™πŸ»πŸŒ»πŸ˜Š

Jul 05, 2016 9:51 AM

NewHope is right about depression & anxiety meds may need changing. Make sure to let your doctor know what's going on. You may just need an increase, or you may need a different med altogether. Hugs & prayers you can soon get better control of the anxiety & depression! πŸ™‚πŸ’•πŸ™πŸŒΌ

Jul 06, 2016 9:45 AM

I see this was posted a month ago so I hope you have gotten some help or relief for at least some of your ailments :( I suffer from Major Depression and chronic pain too and it's no way to live.

Jul 06, 2016 12:34 PM

With chronic illness, its really understandable to want to give up and not really do anything. Its something I fight with all the time. But it's important to try to do as much as you can.
I suggest maybe trying to find a support group,if that's an option for you. Another thing to try is looking up side effects of your regular meds, if you're on any,some meds can make depression worse. I wish you all the best, you have all of us cheering you on. Hugs and best wishes!!

Jul 06, 2016 1:22 PM

Hi Munchkin. I can soooo relate to your feelings. I too tend to isolate & not want to leave my house. I'm constantly fatigued & this has been going on for 5 years now. My house is dusty and dirty and I have no energy to be able to do anything. When I sweep my floors my right hip kills me within a matter of minutes. I rarely open my mail. I have tubs and piles of mail all over my house and in my van. I have difficulty doing laundry and I have things that have been sitting in the laundry tub for a year or more. This has been going on for at least 5 or 6 yrs. I go days without showering because I'm so exhausted. When I do get a shower it helps my frame of mind for that one day and I push myself to do whatever is most pressing and then I'm back to being exhausted and hurting. Sometimes I can't decide what's worse to live with, my pain and exhaustion or my emotional and mental frame of mind. It's a flipping roller coaster ride and I really want to get off. Some days are better and some days are unbearable but I am thankful to be alive. I hang on to hope and prayer to get me through the really tough days. I struggle every day to just function and make it through the day but I'm still alive and I'll keep praying and hanging on to hope that some day things will get better.

Jul 07, 2016 5:46 AM

AnnaJo, I understand what you're saying, I've been there. My Fibro started in 2007 but I left work due to major surgery in 2010 (5 in 1). And more dx were added each year, including sjogrens & hypothyroidism. The Fibro, sjogrens, & hypothyroidism all cause fatigue and when sjogrens & Fibro flare together it's hard to do anything at all. My depression & anxiety returned also. Last summer I was sent to Mayo for dizziness, imbalance, & suspected MS. They diagnosed a cranial 8 nerve dysfunction causing the dizziness & imbalance but also recommended therapy because my body was so weak all over; they called it deconditioned. I went through pt/ot to strengthen my legs & arms and it's helped tremendously. Mayo also recommended behavior modification therapy, but my insurance doesn't cover it. My psychiatrist suggestion psychologist counseling, and she is helping me set small goals to achieve each time I see her. From 2010 until 2016 when everything I needed to do was left undone or partially done, the list is very long. I have made it a goal to get up as if I'm going to work, and get a shower every day no matter how bad I'm feeling. A shower send to revive some energy from deep within for me. Then I tackle one thing at a time. I use a calendar to write things if like to accomplish, then prioritize them. And I'm focusing on one at a time until it's all done. I take breaks often so I don't exhaust myself.
I have had periods of be exercising great, starting slow & steady and increasing as i can tolerate. I walk a treadmill (1.4 mph slowwww), use stretches, 2 lb hands weights & stretch bands. At first I could only walk 5 minutes, then 10, 15, and now I'm at 20... It's taken over a year to get this far, because I've had set backs (injuries & surgeries & sickness & flares). When i can't do it I don't beat myself up mentally. I just rest until I can start again. I feel so much better, more energy & strength to do the things I need. Do I have pain? Yes, absolutely, every day. And sometimes it screams at me at bedtime. But my doc gave me muscle relaxers & voltaren gel rx to help, and if needed tramadol. I'm allergic to most pain meds so I've had to develop a high tolerance, and I only take the tramadol when I'm at a 7+ level of pain. Pain will always beer part of my life, our lives. But we have to fight and struggle through it, with the support of our doctors and this community, if we want to enjoy any part of life.

If your meds aren't working for you then let your docs know; they may need tweaking or changing. I had severe side effects to cymbalta that caused pain increase & psych issues. Psych meds are in my allergy list too. Don't give up fighting! Don't let the pain rule your life! Maybe you could try slow and simple activities and exercises, and work your way to better strength, energy, and getting your house the way you want it. We are all here to support you, and there are so many helpful suggestions. Hugs & prayers you can start regaining some of your life back! πŸ™‚πŸ’•πŸ™πŸŒΌ

Jul 07, 2016 11:57 PM

Thanks for the kind words and suggestions. I think the small goals thing could be a good place to start. Getting up like I'm going to work may be a hard one as mornings are the worst for me. I wake up foggy headed & tired & it takes me a while to get it together. I'm going to give it a try though because having a shower makes a big difference in my mental state & gives me a little more pep in my step. I have so many things I still want to do in life & I'd definitely like to get to a place where I feel like I have a life. I have to disapline myself to go to bed earlier but I have trouble going to sleep & staying asleep. My evenings are when I feel more awake than my mornings & days. I think my internal clock is out of wack. I look forward to learning from the community and the good advice like yours. Thanks again.

Jul 08, 2016 8:38 AM

AnnaJo, I laughed at your comment about mornings being the worst, because you explained my mornings exactly now. I try not to schedule doc appts until after 10 am, because it now takes me 3 hours just to get up, eat, shower, dress, and be alert enough to drive! Lol I think for me, when I had to stop working because of the pain, I was becoming lazy about doing something, anything. But when I made a point to get up just like i was working, at the suggestion of my counselor & PCP, I found I actually have more energy to get me through the day. I'm active awhile then rest, then be active again, then rest. And if I'm so tired i need a nap then I take one. I just try not to sleep more than an hour or my night will be totally messed up. There may be days when you can't accomplish what you hope to, and that's ok. Just take it slow and remember to listen to your body of when you need to take a break. Yesterday, well actually a week now, my head's been so discombobulated that I couldn't accomplish anything. So it was my movie/tv rest day. Good luck! πŸ™‚πŸ’•πŸ™πŸŒΌ

Jul 08, 2016 8:42 AM

Oh yeah, I was having trouble falling asleep too. My psych doc told me to purchase the 5 mg Melatonin and break them in half. Then I'm to take a half tablet if I'm having trouble or don't feel sleepy. He said if I wake up and have trouble going back to sleep then I'm too take another half tablet. I've been doing this since January, and I do try to be in bed by 10; lights out & gadgets off (Lol), except my radio playing softly on a timer. Now I only use the melatonin occasionally. I hope my suggestions, or those from others can be helpful.

May 06, 2019 8:50 AM

Hi I am Shore yes, I’ll admit this to . I have had anxiety all my life and it sure sucks. But I am learning different ways to manage as I am older 48 and cope with it .
I make Prayer cards and Adult coloring. I hope this will help you to .ill pray also for you guys on here hug gently ShoreπŸ™πŸ™πŸŒˆπŸŒˆβ€οΈβ€οΈπŸ’•πŸ’•

May 16, 2019 7:48 PM

I totally get it. I have both of those diagnosis also plus like 8 more but, it sure does suck the life out of us. Its not fair but, we gotta keep on pushing. I hioe youre feeling better today munchkin. 😊🌈

May 16, 2019 8:49 PM

Hi I’m an adult I not a munchkin I’m 48 so gtg bye bye all Shore

May 18, 2019 3:05 AM

I am 29 and have been dealing with chronic pain and illnesses and cancer since I 13 and I understand your pain and suffering ... but there are many ways and reasons to keep going on this journey of ours. Just know that you are not going through this alone ... and you are always one click away from talking to someone who understands .... message me if you need to talk

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