Every single day I think to myself "I cannot go on living like this ". I am lucky to have a partner who is as supportive as he can be considering he doesn't suffer chronic illness. I guess that's what keeps me going, I wouldn't be here without him. Unfortunately sometimes it's not enough as I feel he's better off without me, being a burden. My question is, what keeps you going , day in day out?
Katpain, what keeps me going? Humm, I gotta outlive my husband, lol. My sarcasm is my way of helping me, some days. I live an abused childhood and I learned very early no one was going to see if they hurt me, so having been raised up that way, I guess you can say I use that mentality to keep going. But I also read the Bible daily. I posted in my blog about how I think Job had to have been a great grand father way back when. I don't know how many times I search that book out. But I blog, listen to calming music, Bible, and my tablet. I sit outside, no matter how cold, each morning. Listening to the birds makes me smile.
I also do mindfulness, which is basically what you're doing by enjoying each and every thing you can. Unfortunately, again, this does not help me get back to work. If I knew I could afford to live without working, then these techniques may be enough to help me manage however I have the intense stress upon me to have to get back to work ASAP. The stress on top of the pain almost sends me crazy.
Welcome katpain! I remember being where you are when my chronic pain issues started in 2007. Then I became disabled after a surgery in 2010, due to overlapping and ever increasing new diagnosed chronic pain & other health problems. Other than OA & DDD that started in the 1990's I had considered myself super healthy. I sadly can't say the same anymore. I remember feeling so depressed and thinking my hubby and family would be better off without me. It turned out that part of those feelings weren't just depression due to circumstances, but suicidal ideations due to my reaction to cymbalta (I have a very long list of med sensitivity). I've had times over the past 10 years where is feel it's be best for him if I weren't here. But then I realized how very much he loves me & I love him. I realize how devastated I'd be without him & know deep down he'd be lost without me. So he keeps me going, as well as my kids & grandkids, & I'm not ready to give up. I just get tired of hurting. Try warm shower, pain ointments, gentle stretches and joint flexing if able, rotate activity with rest periods, and as Groggy said, "one day at a time.". When you feel your worse pamper yourself and rest, rest, rest. Hugs love and prayers you have as pain free a weekend as possible! 🙂❤🙏🌼