It's been 14 months since my doctor took me off long acting Nycenta. I still have short acting but it's not enough to help take away the pain. Every month I bring up the fact that my Pain is really bad and that the current treatment plan isn't working. Yes, without them it's almost unbearable. Every month they say the same things: "it's just pain, it won't kill you", "I had chronic pain, but I had a spiritual awakening and am cured", "it's not that bad, you're just drug seeking".
So I finally had it... After 72 hours without sleep and my doctor saying, "they used to keep prisoners of war awake for long periods of time. It caused some to go insane" WTF.
SO I told her that they are not listening and noone in the office cares. I've done everything they told me, therapy, CBT, Acceptance, exercise, diet, sleep routine, etc. Yes, some helps but what I really need is not to have them take me off my meds...But to come up with a plan.
Do I need the meds, no. But my quality of life is deteriorating. Now their plan is to take everything away.
So I got fed up. Said, sure your CRPS went into remission. But mine didn't. When the pain is at its worst, I sometimes feel like blowing my brains out. It just gets so bad.
So she says I need a psych evaluation and they won't prescribe any meds until I meet with THEIR counselor. I said, you're NOT listening. I'm trying to describe what the worst pain feels like because cutting, burning, stabbing, inability to talk or drive doesn't relate well. So now I have to meet with the counselor Tuesday. WTF. She jumps right to policy and procedure. I Demanded that she listen to me and stop with all the "regulations" excuses and policies. If I was going to self-harm...I wouldn't tell them. There's a difference between expressing how bad it gets and doing something harmful. I am not in a place where I'd harm myself. Not only because I love my life and my family but because though it's bad and horrible at the worst, I always get through it. I just want to feel normal.
The appointment ended with, "there's no magic pill, you just need to accept it. You're doing all the right things". Nothing to help with Slee except "we need you to talk to a sleep specialist". Ugh... 12 years of pain and counseling I know what to do. Stop treating me like a new patient.
My other doctor, the one who did the surgery in another state is trying to refer me to a doctor locally who might do a pain pump. Honestly I fee like this might work. No side effects with 1/300 dose. But I just need to find someone willing to help. :/
So tired of the drama. I just want an empathetic and compassionate doctor.