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Faking The Smile thru the pain!

Oct 16, 2016 10:09 PM

My journey started about 3 years ago. I one day woke up and was really sore and thought that maybe I just slept wrong as the week progressed my pain in my back and my right leg was hurting so bad that I couldn't even get out of bed. I still to this day do not know what happened or what triggered my pain but during my three-year Journey I saw a pain management doctor who has done 3 epidural steroid injections, 2 nerve blocks, and 2 nerve ablation. I then lost my insurance do to the wonderful Oil Business where my husband lost his job due to cutbacks so therefore we lost our insurance so I had to be put on State Insurance. Also I had to locate a new pain management doctor since my current pain management doctor at the time no longer accepted my new insurance. So I was referred to a different pain management doctor who I only saw for 2 months because he had no intention on giving me a treatment plan all he wanted to do was give me 10 milligram Norco and send me on my way needless to say I only saw this doctor for 2 months and begged my primary care doctor to find me a new doctor Who will try to fix me not just feed me pills. So after finding a new doctor he went ahead and did another epidural injection but this one was different from the previous one I had and to no avail this did not work. So he decided that the best treatment plan for me is to see a neurosurgeon I am now waiting to have an EMG done on my lower back in The L4, L5 and S1 the EMG also includes both of my legs. Through all the pain that I have been suffering I have still had the duties of being a wife and a mother of three beautiful girls. But what I I'm struggling with is that my family does not understand the pain that I go through daily. My father-in-law is now experiencing numbness in his right hand which wakes him up everyday in pain and now all of a sudden he is griping about how much he hurts and how much this pain is disrupting his life but at the same time he makes me feel as if the pain I have been going through for 3 years is nowhere near the pain he is enduring now. I just wish people in my family would understand how hard it is for me just to even get out of bed daily. I don't want them to treat me differently I just want some compassion and understanding I know people say that no one will understand the pain that people who suffer from chronic pain daily these people will never understand unless they go through it themselves. Do any of you have the same issue?

Oct 16, 2016 10:19 PM

Yes..i deal with the lack of understanding on a day to day basis. It's awful and is so detrimental to our recover or at least learning how to live our new normal.

Oct 16, 2016 10:23 PM

My husband is a great supporter and is very compassionate about my pain because he sees it daily and he has seen what it has done from the very beginning so I have to thank him daily for his understanding. It just disrupts our life because although I am very fortunate that he owns his own business and has the flexibility to be able to take off if I need him on the days that my pain is at a level 9 or above I know he gets frustrated because he has work to do which is to provide for our family so it is a daily struggle for him and myself when I'm having those really bad days.

Oct 16, 2016 11:24 PM

Hello Told a - I don't think I have met you yet. But my rememberer is broke so forgive me if I have. :)

My family is mixed in the understanding thing. Unfortunately my mom understands as she also has many of the same issues. My dad - the Major - will never understand. He pushes through all life throws him. Diabetes, heart attacks, neuropathy etc. Plus the many things that come with agent Orange exposure. He was always taught to "show no weakness". So it's hard for him to comprehend when mom can't do things or when I need a down dad (I am my mother's caregiver). However both of my children (ages 35 and 30) understand.

The great thing about groups like this is that everyone here does understand. We can talk about things we wouldn't share anywhere else and not only will others understand but we won't judge either.

Oct 16, 2016 11:41 PM

Hello Mimikay, no we have not met as I am new to this app and group. But I am so thankful I found this place of such amazing people who, yes, do understand. I just feel weak at time because I'm in the prime of my life (34 years old) and I feel like my body has failed me. I want to do the things people my age are able and capable of doing but yet I find myself in my bedroom watching tv. Netflix has been my friend more days than not and it kills me inside to have to suffer.

Oct 16, 2016 11:59 PM

I can certainly empathise. So often I find myself getting lost in a book. I have to force myself to.put it down and make myself move. Even if it's to just go outside to enjoy a beautiful day. The change of scenery helps. Am so sorry you are dealing with this. ((((gentle hugs))))

Oct 17, 2016 12:18 AM

MIMIKAY: Yes, I have a permanent butt imprint on my lounge chair outside but most of the time I can only enjoy it at night because the Heat and the sun makes me nauseated due to the medication that I take. But at night time it is absolutely wonderful.

Oct 17, 2016 2:18 AM

It took my husband 5 years and being laid off to understand my pain. (He was home to watch me struggle)
I use the VA so I too had to Dr. hop because of pill pushers.
As far as your in-laws go, get a My give a damn is busted attitude. No one has the right to judge you unless they're walked in your shoes & walked your path with 3 daughters and hubby to care for!!
Sounds like hubby tries. I learned that my hubby just wants to fix me, when he can't help me it makes him feel bad.

Oct 17, 2016 4:21 AM

Mzladybug that is exactly what my husband says, he wants to fix me but he can't and it hurts him to know that he can't do anything for me but be my cheerleader and send me positive healing thoughts.

Oct 17, 2016 8:43 AM

Tilda -
I love the night. One of the things I enjoy is tent camping. I have to bring several foam mattress pads to sleep on but it's amazing to leave the canopy off the tent and sleep under the stars. :) Only get to do it a few times each year when I visit my best friend in Texas but it gives me time to just breathe.

Did you see the moon last night? Beautiful.

Is it starting to cool down where you are?

Oct 22, 2016 4:30 AM

Shannon902 love the chart, thank you!

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