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frustrated d rant.

Sep 10, 2015 4:41 PM

Hey all. Its been a interesting. Few days. First I'll say. My mom has been doing better ..seeming to to understand actively although I also feel she is attempting to seek attention on herself or try to get menic sympathy. She tries to say oh I see how u could hurt because I'm tired from lifting water etc. ..but at any rate. I'm so tickes right now. I've gotten some new meds from the doc so it was time for my next dose and then mom decided to mop the floor. My dad has a chemo treatment today a d he is a bit tired. So any who she mops we wait bout 15 min then she starts to rant about us needing to stay put and get off her floor. I was going to get food to take my meds with and dad was heading to the bathroom. Dad gets to the bathroom
( keep in mind dad is on a walker) so while dad is in restroom she mops floor again in the hallway of bathroom. And then fussing at him and me bout walking on her floor. Then she comes to me and yells do u need anything else before I mop the floor. So yes. For the first time in my adult life. I s
Openly show discontent for her actions. And so now I'm in my room attptong to remember she is my mom and this is her house. I love her and I know this is a stressful time for her.but dang. Why does she have to do this.
Sorry I just had to get that out.

Sep 10, 2015 5:10 PM

Newfibrogirl, never, ever be sorry for getting something off your chest. That is the purpose of a support group. So you can rant, ask questions, offer others help, whine, cry, etc. and there is no judgement or hard feelings here. Only the support and compassion you are seeking). My Mother does similar things. She is a very staunch German lady who has routines that she doesn't vary from. She's been doing it that way for as long as any of us can remember and if she stops in the middle of something, she will then forget to do something. I can be in agony, not being able to get myself moving and if I finally get the energy to go in the shower (which I shower EVERY day unless I'm hurting so bad that I can't, I'll go in the next day). But, I digress, she will get mad because she "just put clean towels up". I tell her to leave me the "dirty" towel (which nobody uses but me because it's a huge bath towel) and she says no, then when you're done, I have to take it downstairs to the laundry room!! I get the frustration. I'm glad that you stood up to her and told her how you felt... She needed to hear it!! Wishing you the best. 💕🙏🏻🌻

Sep 10, 2015 5:21 PM

Thank you alwayzinpain... Its been a long road with me and my foot and I'm sure its more to come. But yes. It did bother me.. My sister has long to me ago been done with walking on egg shells with my mom. She has been talking to me for a while about not codaling my mom. Interesting enough about an hour or so after this happened and I've folded the load of laundry that I washed. That she comes in my room and says thank you to me.. In my moms world. That was her way of saying she was sorry. Part of me feels when these this GS happen that I should just move back with my boyfriend. I moved here to help her with my dad and then found I was I'll too..but of course I would feel bad leaving especially of I was angry when I did. But my boyfriend is so ready for me to come back home to him. Its a wild and crazy ride..

Sep 10, 2015 10:38 PM

Newfibrogirl, you don't have to apologize. As AlwayZ said, this is where you can release frustrations safely. Try not to be so hard on yourself or your mom. She's likely stressed about your dad and you, but she doesn't know how to express herself except doing what she did. Does that make sense? I'm not taking up for her by any means.

And if you think your be better off at the boyfriend's, would you be able to pitch in occasionally with your dad? I know from your other posts you wouldn't want to feel like you were abandoning him. But if you can't take care of yourself, you'll be no good to help others. (((Hugs))) & a prayer you'll know what to do that's best for all. 🙏🌼

Sep 11, 2015 9:13 AM

Flappy is right, if you could barely look after yourself, you could possibly endanger both yourself and your dads health. Please take care. We will support whatever decision you make here and we would understand, no judgements here.

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