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Guilt!

Jul 01, 2017 9:21 PM

Today my 7yr old told my husband that he is always worried about me and the pain I'm in, so much so he has asked to learn how to email his dad at work when he is worried about me as he thinks telling me will make me worse.. I have a veriety of health issues. I feel so guilty. He should not have to worry so much about me.

Jul 02, 2017 3:42 AM

He loves you. Let him worry and tell him how to help, but try to not ask him for help, even as he gets older. I grew up with two parents with chronic illness. Kids at that age want to do what their parents do, like vacuuming and cooking. Your 7 year old probably wants to help like his dad does, so let him, just don't start expecting him to or give him that responsibility or he might grow to resent it. I think the freedom in this area is important. My mom started expecting my help all the time, like a live in aide because my father was also ill, and I think that's what made me resent helping her when I initially desperately wanted to.

Tl;dr: don't feel guilty about your kid wanting to help. That means you've done well as a parent. Forcing your child to help is what is dangerous. And remember that asking for help too often can feel overwhelming for a kid at any age.

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