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Hate waking up to stress causing more pain

Nov 21, 2015 10:05 AM

Morning everyone.... Well my first full day on my increased level of lyrica went well.. I woke up this morning feeling cloudy and hurt..then I hear my mom fussing at my dad telling him if he gets out in the hospital again he gonna be there alone...that absolutely pissed me off..(soory for language).. For the new friends my dad has multiple cancers and is recovering from a cold. Myom and dad both had it real bad. Dad got over his a little faster then mom so mom feels that dad is forcing himself to not cough . the fact is she is mad he got better faster then she did. She was being rude.to him yesterday too. While I was attempting to help her rest by baking the cakes for her this year . she came to the kitchen fussing at me about taking things away from her so I tried to explain I was trying to help her.please keep in mind I'm in pain as we having this fuss out ..so later I here her fussing at dad and she says you can move that car yourself I'm not doing it. So I go and low and behold dad moving his recliner well trying to that is.. Oh I was done.. Needless to say I'm done baking I made one cake and then I stopped and I had a talk with dad toake sure I was here for him. I just wish my mom would let use help and stop being so mean. It's very to a point I feel mom need to be put somewhere.. Any tips ideas ect.

Nov 21, 2015 2:14 PM

Sorry to hear you're having so much trouble there. I don't have any tips to offer. I'm currently living in a house with a lawyer, his chronically sick wife (my bonus mom) and her rehabilitating son so stresses are high with everyone setting each others triggers off and I just sit in my corner singing "why can't we be friends"
My bonus mom has a really hard time with things because she used to be able to maintain the entire house herself and grocery shop and do all the normal mother wife day to day things but now she has been sick for 6 years with no diagnosis and has a hard time making it out of bed even to use the washroom. She feels a huge lose of control and quality of lif, that stress tends to be shown through her reactions to leaving a door open or a light left on. I find myself snapping about things that I generally don't care about when I'm worn out and tired

Nov 23, 2015 5:00 PM

Newfibrogirl, it's likely your mom's loss of abilities combined with her current illness has made her grumpy and agitated, because she doesn't want to admit she needs help. On the other hand if she's always been this way, but is now worse, try talking to her at a time when she's calmed down. If necessary talk to her doctor. No one deserves to be snapped at habitually, and regardless an apology should be made by her. Just offer help and if she says no, rest and be there for your dad. But I would speak up and politely ask her not to speak to you, your dad or anyone else so rudely.

I asked my stepmom if she wanted us to come Wednesday so I could help her with the meal and she quickly replied "no. I don't like anyone else in my kitchen.". My previous stepmom was the same way, and so is my daughter. Some women just feel that way about " too many cooks in the kitchen. ". Try and rest up so you can enjoy the holiday. Hugs & prayers for you & your family. 🙏🌼

Nov 23, 2015 5:37 PM

Thanks flappys my mom has indeed been this way however the older she gets the worst it gets. And the longer my dad and myself are sick the more hard she gets. Im worried bout her im worried bout me. I honestly would like to move on my own again. I don't see how that is gona happen but I still want it..
I normally don't comfort my mom in such ways however the more we go down this road of sickness the more I'm seeing a need for a chat. Neither me nor my dad need such stress around. Thanks for the advice

Nov 27, 2015 8:28 PM

You are right. Praying God will give you the words to say and her the ears and heart to hear it without losing her cool! (((Hugs!))) 🙏🌼

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