I was crying last night (something I rarely do these days) thinking about how everything in my life I have ever loved has been ripped away from me through out my life (long stories including my kids, homelessness, abandonment, I get the idea) and now my quality of life is gone because of my chronic pain and fatigue. All I have left is my best friend and husband of 16 years. And the thought of losing him too is killing me. I have nothing else to lose but him so it's logical to think he's next.
My husband (Shawn is his name lol should have mentioned that earlier) says he's not going anywhere. That if he hasn't left me by now he never will. He thinks I'm being fatalistic and dwelling on things that will never happen.
He says he understands my greif over losing my health but I should accept it and let it go, like has had to over the years. But his way of dealing with loss has deadened a part of him and I can't live like that.
I know I need to figure out a way to get through all of this, and crying helps even though I hate it. I have lost a lot and moved on but this is a loss I will be reminded of every day.
I just want to know how you deal with getting a diagnosis of a chronic disease? How long has it taken before you could get over it so to speak? Can anyone relate?