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how does everyone deal?

Apr 02, 2015 12:51 PM

I'm having a very hard time right now dealing with the emotional side of having fibro and I'm just wondering what helps people get through it. I'm upset and sad because I work and it's harder to keep up and I'm so tired of being tired and hurting. Any advice anyone has to share would be greatly appreciated.

Apr 02, 2015 1:27 PM

Sorry you are dealing with this. You will find that everyone here is dealing with a crappy set of cards. Welcome to the group. I deal with my pain with everything I have- hot epsom salt baths, music, modified yoga, I try to keep moving even when I am crying, I journal to look for trends anything that could be a trigger - foods can trigger more pain, over doing it (my speciality) try to take breaks (I suck at that) but know I need to. Do your very BEST TO STAY IN FRONT OF THE PAIN! Take your medication when you are at a pain level of 6-7 and do NOT wait until you are at a 9-10. It is so very hard to control pain after you pass the point of no return, crying at a level 10. Have a support system talk to someone you trust. Also save money if at all possible because you never know what tomorrow brings. If you should have to file for disability know that you will probably have to wait two years to MAYBE get approved. Most people could starve before then. I truly hope I have helped you in some small way. If you have not looked up the "Spoon Theory - you do not look like you're in pain" please watch the video it will help you explain why you cannot do everything to yourself and others. It helped me feel better about dealing with the things I can no longer do. You will always have all of us here anytime to talk to and or vent to. Support is vital.

Apr 02, 2015 1:33 PM

Lucky13, I'm sorry you're having a hard time. I've been there and so has everyone else with any chronic condition. In the yers I worked I was called a "type A" personality, a "perfectionist," and even "anal retentive," because I always went above and beyond, and I expected that from others too. When I began getting sick and then quit my job due to necessary long term recovery, I still attempted to keep everything perfect. It was my goal to return to work, but my health issues kept multiplying. I refused to acknowledge or even discuss I would never return to work, return to the field of medical records & coding. I fought my husband and family for four years. When I began having severe cognitive issues that caused problems with my daily functions and paying bills I finally accepted and admitted that I am never returning to work, that I'm disabled now. It also took doctors saying I should put in for disability. Once I admitted it I began grieving for the loss of myself, of who I use to be and what I once did but was no longer capable of. It truly is just like grieving over the loss of a loved one. Anger is a step in that process. Some go through grief quickly and others take longer. Frustration is another. In the 5+ years I've been going through it, realizing & accepting my life will never be the same again, I've also purposely focused on what I can do, what I still have to offer, my husband, my children, grandchildren, siblings and parents. Focusing on and trying to stay positive, and my faith, are all what keeps me going instead of just throwing up my hands, being bitter & angry & jealous of others, and laying around in a constant pity party. That's not saying I don't have bad days, moody days, frustrating and veting days. I do but they're nowhere as bad as I use to have. I think back to something my grandmother use to say about "days of struggle." She'd say, "when you're at rock bottom and can't see anything but bad, think about on what good things you have, your blessings and how you bless others. You'll be surprised at what you find out.". She's right because when I focus on my blessings there's no room for thinking of the " what was, what should have been." Its a difficult road to travel, accepting what is no more, but I believe that you'll adjust and find what you do have and still can do. You may have to adjust time frames or methods, but you'll figure it out. I'm praying for you!
. 🙏🌼

Apr 02, 2015 1:34 PM

PS... LMB stated methods that I use also.

Apr 02, 2015 1:58 PM

FlappysLady81- I am right there with you. All of it. Type A with OCD to the core. It is very hard when we realize we have no control of what our bodies are doing to us. Anger, bitter and jealousy very hard to accept. Keep on fighting and always be your own best advocate. There is not much that I would not try. Lucky13 and everyone give yourself permission to be selfish when needed.

Apr 02, 2015 4:22 PM

Lucky13 Everyone ahead of me pretty much said it. I relie on my faith,I try to find as much laughter as I can in my life. Learn to enjoy the most simplest things in life that we seem to overlook when we are going none stop everyday. When you live with chronic pain you can either let it own you or own it by still living your life. It's going to be a dice rent life but it can still be a good life. You just have to learn your limitations on what you can and can't do anymore. Belive me your body will let you know. I still have problems knowing when to stop like last night I had been at the hospital with my daughter 24 hrs came home made the mistake of going out to check on the garden saw that the grass was starting to grow in it so stupid me gets the hoe and gets rid of the grass. End of story I have been in bed all day hurting and sleeping? Was it worth it no it wasn't and I am paying for the next two to three days. I have a hard time stopping something when I start it. There are people here with several chronic diseases as well as other health problems, we all try to be a sport system to lean on for each other.

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