Me , I am determined to work in my thought processes, I add a lot more to my aches / depression with how I think. So, I keep it very simple complete one task at a time ,slow and steady with rest in between and I praise myself for doing it or even putting it off! Love y'all!
Hmmmm that looks a bit preachy to me as I read it... So sorry y'all , its just that I have let depression and chronic pain consume me and it has been a determined climd out of the hell I was in. I do by no means, intend to preach. This is just me stuff. Love yall
Terri, I newsstand what you were saying. Having battles depression to the point of having fear of leaving my home, I know positive thinking works best for me. I use to be a"glass half empty " girl but with lots of work I try to see everything as a "glass half full" situation.
Fluffmeister, take one step at a time and rest. Attack the easiest to complete first, so that as your accomplishments accumulate, it will quickly outnumber the to-do stack. Rest in between often enough to hold out. And if you don't complete something, pat yourself on the back for what you have done. Good luck & God bless! 🙂🌼🙏😷
Fluffmiester take it one chore at a time. I just cleaned for 2 hours straight. I haven't done that in at least a year. I'm extremely proud. I was also a caregiver, that can be emotionally draining. Take it step by step. If you have kids have them help you out. That's how most chores are done in my home on a daily. Good luck and take care
Awe, Phoenix, we all have those days ,weeks or even longer periods of time when our pain mounts vicious attacks draining us from the simplest thing( like taking a shower). I know you are frustrated beyond words, but, please o please just keep hanging in there. You will get a respite and your hope and energy will come bouncing back even if for a short time. Love and Blessings, Terri
But it's always the same. It's just over and over and over never ending pounding dragged into the undertow and pounded by wave after wave of pain and exhaustion and it's so unfair and I wonder what did I do that makes me have to live this way and I'm envious of my friends who can go about their day and groan about their long day at work and go to sleep and wake up refreshed and can go out and have fun and be normal. Why is this happening to me? I'm a good person, I thought. I want to bargain with someone for my old life back, but where do I go for that? Or just sleep until I can really wake up from this nightmare, cuz it can't be real, right? This can't really be happening to me.... But it is... and I'm awake... And it's never going to end,... Is it?
Phoenix , I know what you are going through is Real. But you losing your sense of self , does not have to happen. I completely understand, 100%! It sucks ! But it is your reality, we can't change that, the only thing we can do is surrender and accept. With that, it sounds passive but it really is not.. It is empowering. You can then start finding you way back to YOU. How would the "old" you handle this, etc. You are not lost, you just need help steering your way through this. The pain is Real and it may be awhile for that to be manageable... But what you can do for you is use the complete wonderfulness of your lost /old you to live through this.I am here to remind you that you will rise , just like your name... Pheonixrising!!! Hang tough girlfriend... We can do this one step at a time. (Sorry if it sounded preachy)/Terri
Phoenixrising, It took me four years to accept that my pain & chronic illnesses were never going to go away and will over time worsen. It was not an easy process and I nearly ran myself crazy. Being raised in a Christian home, I have a deeply rooted faith in God and His love for me. I began to replace my own questions of "why me" and "what did I do to deserve this" with "Why not me," & "who am I that I shouldn't suffer," & "what is God trying to achieve by letting me go through this?" I do not have all the answers but I do have peace, because I began to ask myself, "what has anyone done to deserve this kind of suffering," or "what has an innocent baby done to be born crippled?". I believe that God allows all of us to go through suffering, and He helps us to gain strength, compassion, & understanding for others through the process.
I'm not trying to tell you how to think or feel. I'm only sharing with you what has helped me accept and begin to take control (not of the diseases) of how these conditions control my abilities to get from one day to the next. Does that make sense? It isn't easy accepting my new life, but I can't change it so I either accept it and find ways of coping through it, or I give up (not an option because I'm not ready to leave my loved ones no matter how much I am suffering). I'm sending you gentle (((hugs))) and saying a prayer for you to find the strength to fight and find your way through it too. You can rise again, but in a different way. Think of a rose bush, how when one bloom is fading and the petals are failing off, there is another bus beginning to open up. If you look closely, no two blondes are exactly alike; just like snowflakes, yet they're beautiful just the same. Allow yourself to blossom anew 🌹
Terri, you so explained my exact thoughts last year, to finally surrender & accept that "this is my new normal life.". And it is empowering, even though every day is a challenge to get through, some more than others. 🙂🌼🙏😷
Phoenix, I am right there with you. I realize that none of us chose to give up our normal life to live in chronic pain. It can be terrifying to think of living a whole lifetime like this. I honestly believe we need to go through the stages of grief, because the person we once were is lost. What has helped me the most is: 1. Listen to your body. If it says sleep--sleep. If it says take a break, take it. This can be challenging when blended into real life, but you'll find ways to make it work. 2. Do not fill your day up with plans. You'll only be disappointed when you can't complete what you thought you should have been able to do. 3. Make small goals, and congratulate yourself when you meet them (e.g. I am going to wash my hair today). 4. Do not compare yourself to others, or your old self. If you had been in a crippling car accident, you (and others) would not be putting past expectations on yourself. We are crippled on the inside.
I was totally happy to be diagnosed with Fibro (because I finally had a name for how I felt) and absolutely devastated because my MD explained I would have to live like this for the rest of my life. It's true that the old me is gone. But the new me that I am creating is pretty awesome too. The cool thing is you get to pick how the new version of you is.
Flappys, I've been having that same kind of conversation with myself with turning that, "Why me" into "What can I do to help?" When I was little, my dad used to sing, "This little light of mine" to us. I find that song floating around my head from time to time. I just have to keep my light shinning in the darkness for others. That's how I feel.