I apologize for this sensitive and extremely embarrassing topic, but I need to vent.
Anyone who has IBS knows how unpredictable bowel movements can be. Due to issues I have with my pelvic floor dysfunction (PFD), my gastroenterologist doc has me tracking my bm. Due to the PFD I also have bladder issues, getting my urine flow to start and continue. In late June, early July the urologist did pfd therapy to help the urine flow control. Third treatment in, it backfired and caused me to start having diarrhea and severe incontinence, total loss of bowel function contPFD has. They stopped their bladder treatment, waiting on Mayo.
I went to the gastroenterologist PFD center for therapy to reverse the damage from bladder treatment. But they won't do anything because they're wanting to wait for me to go to Mayo in Sept.
The past 6 weeks have been a nightmare for me in regards to my IBS & PFD. This month alone I've had 50+ bowel movements, 25 either loose or diarrhea, and out of those 10 horrible accidents with shoulder clothing!!! This morning I literally had less than 15 seconds warning to get to a toilet... Didn't make it, and I've been in a depends all freaking day! My PFD made me not be able to recognize or feel any warning until the poops at the door... literally.
I'm so sick and tired of not knowing from one day to the next whether I'll even be able to leave home safely or not, without finding myself in an embarrassing predicament! I hate having to cancel plans because I can't stay more than 5-10 feet from a toilet! I hate that neither PFD therapy clinics have been willing to help me!
This afternoon I sent a message to the GI surgeon, telling him what's above. I told him if I have to choose between bowel and bladder control I definitely choose bowel control. I literally begged him to bring me back in for PFD therapy to regain bowel muscle control! I let him know that there's very few places to stop and find a toilet when I go to Mayo. And I don't need the stress of not having the ability to retain my stool until I find a convenient place! I let him know that Mayo is NOT going to be looking at my IBS or PFD. I told him Mayo will strictly be reviewing and testing my dizziness, imbalance, tremors and memory/MRI changes.
If they don't help me I guess I'll be in freaking diapers the rest of my life!!! I should never have allowed the Urogynecologist to inject my pelvic floor muscles, 8 trigger point injx! I should have listened to that inner voice subconsciously telling me not to get it done. I had complete bowel control until the injx and bladder pfd therapy. I could kick myself... And the technician too! I told her it was very painful but she assurred me she had to do the treatment because the muscles were "brick hard stiff.". Maybe that was for a reason...hmmm?
Sorry for the rant but my hubby had been zero support tonight. He's been too busy talking about everyone else he knows or works with to even notice I'm extra quiet tonight. I wonder why? NOT! I'm just in a very foul mood, something that's so unlike me. I just want to scream😫 and cry out of sheer frustration. 😭
Here's hoping everyone else has a good night. 🌚🌌 I've actually stressed myself right into a headache, so I think I'll go to bed early. Goodnight to all! 🙏🌼