Apparently doing the best I can on any given day is no good. Fibromyalgia is highly inconsistent, one minute you can do something and the next not a chance and vice versa.
Well today I got completely shit on by my manager for being inconsistent. For saying one day that I needed help lifting something or opening doors and then another day not needing help. For saying I'm not ok to take that overtime and then picking up shifts when I'm able to so that I don't screw who ever wants leave over and I pull my weight. For asking them to upgrade the hvac system so that the stuff from the airport doesn't get in the in the building then needing to use mint oil topically to get through my shift so someone doesn't need to come in early.
Apparently asking for help over an email and explaining why you need the air intake for the building closed most of the way and why you would like the airport contacted to see if they could not do what ever is causing the smell (critical software load that shouldn't be cancelled because you got sick from the chemicals so looking for ways to prevent them entering the building) it's a threat.
I have been told that my options at this point are to quit or transfer to a different department (moving to a different city) because I "keep asking for help from the company yet refuse to do anything to try to help yourself. If you can't work by the airport then it's time you left'. It's going to be 5 to 10 years before they start the hvac upgrade.
The manager said that most of the group has made official complaints about me to him. (The one guy I talked to about this thinks the manager is exaggerating and that it might be one or two people out of 14, and he wonders if the boss is listening in on people making fun of me when I'm not around and talking that as complaints)
He says he needs hard evidence of my illnesses and he needs concrete limitations like can't lift more than 5 pounds or can't work more than 7 hours in a 24 hour period.
Both fibromyalgia and multiple chemical sensitivity are diagnosis of elimination, how am I supposed to have concrete proof? And fibro is so inconsistent, am i supposed to do nothing when i feel ok so that i come across as consistent instead of doing the best i can (what ever that happens to be) on that day?
I'm not to talk about chemicals or how someone someone is wearing is making me sick, I'm not to ask for my space when someone gets too close that is wearing something that'll make me ill.
I'm not to send any more emails asking for help like I did with the air intake.
I'm not to say poisoned or chemicals at work anymore, they are to be removed from my vocabulary.
I do all I can to try to get better. I spend a lot of money on my health. Do I need to record my appointments so that my manager can see that im trying?
I can't afford to quit, we moved into the right house for us less than a year ago and I don't want to move. No one will hire me because of my issues.
At least I managed to finish my shift before crying. Although driving and bawling is very scary, I don't recommend it.