You start to wake up, though its a bit later in the morning than you used to. When you first open your eyes, there is some grogginess (from your previous nights meds) and your head hurts a bit. You slowly move your feet over the bed and onto the floor. That takes about 10 minutes. You then get enough courage to stand up. That might take 4 or 5 tries, but you finally succeed!. Ok, now that you are standing, whats next? You try to take a few steps. The first 3 drive pain all over your body. You just want to stop and dive back into bed. But you keep thinking to yourself, If I can only make it to the shower, then I will feel better You do shower, but towel drying is hard because you cant move the towel that easy.
You are up, start to get dressed. Gosh how difficult is it to put on socks. Then you try to put pants on. If you are standing, you almost fall because one leg gets stuck. If you are sitting, you get both legs on but then realize you cant get up without falling. Shoes, for now forget them. You have some coffee (or tea) and find something that will calm down your stomach.
On your way to work, or like many of us, cant work, but have some errands to run. You get into your car. Now that is a feat in itself. You never realized how difficult going from standing up to sitting in a car seat is. You plopped your butt on the seat and try to get your legs to swing into the car. Now you are set, heading out. Five minutes on the road and road rage erupts.... (well for me at least) Why are there other people on the road? Doesnt everyone know that when I go out in the car and have to go someplace, no one else should be on the road!
You are exhausted, you hurt, you are waiting for the recent dosage of pain meds to kick in. Lunch time comes and you have no appetite, you skip it.
Gosh, isnt the day over yet? but its only 2:00pm. You try to smile you way through the afternoon. But all the while you just wish you could be laying down, sitting in a hot pool or anything to give you some relief. The phone rings one ring, two,,,three... guess thats why there are phone machines.
Day is almost over for most, but for you its been a century. People start coming home from work, getting ready for dinner. You want to sit down, you really cant think of much except you are hurting and want to be alone. Dinner comes, if its a good day, you muster up strength and act normal for everyone.
Evening You try to watch TV, but your legs are burning, you have tingling in your toes and are just uncomfortable. Sometimes family and/or friends join in to make it a good night. You get a few "Oh you look good, are you getting better?" You do everything you can to not jump up and attack that person... Instead you mutter something or just look the other way.
You get ready for bed. For a second you wish things were so different. You cry a little and realize that you will have to go through the same thing tomorrow!
Chronic Pain is no FUN!
I just wish everyone coukd understand. I wanted to post this on my fb page but not sure if it will be received well.