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Let's talk about sex

Jul 08, 2016 3:56 PM

Been in pain all the time or having weak limbs is ruining my sex life.
I'm not as "athletically enthusiastic" as I used to be as my arms and legs won't "take the strain", so its become boring and monotonous, and I can't get in the mood because I know I'm going to be in agony afterwards, or even worse, halfway through and have to call it off.
Any ideas?

Jul 08, 2016 3:58 PM

My husband knows it's not him, but can't help feeling rejected, and I feel guilty. We're in our thirties and my Single Nan gets more action than we do. (go nan)

Jul 08, 2016 4:22 PM

Im 44... my husband bought a Nissan Skyline... (christmas n birthdays i get him so drunk his willy wont work... so he sleeps like a baby) shame innit... but 'Go nan!' ❤

Jul 08, 2016 4:33 PM

Scrossy, I wish I could offer words of encouragement. But unfortunately our sex life is non existent. We are in our 50's, married 35, and the sex started dwindling after my hysterectomy in 1995. Two years later (post-op) I began having all kinds of pelvic floor problems that left me in tears if we tried. It helped my hubby understand when he went to one of my pelvic floor therapies; he could see just how painful the exam & treatment was. We finally gave up trying. And in the last year I've kept thrush (asthma meds & possibly Autoimmune issues) in my mouth so badly he teased that I have cooties. That's because my doc told him it is contagious, so he won't kiss me without asking if the cities are gone. Lol! But we are very close and loving, and there is assurance that sex doesn't make the marriage or devotion to each other. Sex was great while it lasted, but true love and commitment is way deeper.

I will suggest that since you are experiencing pain, look into a Urogynecologist specialist, especially if you have pain in the perineal area. This subject has been discussed multiple times. Search for it and see if there are suggestions in those threads. Hugs & prayers you can get some answers! 🙂💕🙏🌼

Jul 08, 2016 4:55 PM

I'm ok in "that" department, it's just my back, arms and legs. They are weak all the time, but if I do my marital duties, they are so painful in my joints and muscles. I don't want this to be the end as we are both youngish, or should I just lay there like a sack of potatoes and hope he likes the end result.

Jul 08, 2016 7:20 PM

My OA was affecting me in my 30s also; spine, hips & knees. We played around with positions and anything that kept my thighs closer to the body was best & easiest.

Jul 08, 2016 7:52 PM

Hi Scrossy, I can relate to the difficulties you are having. It certainly isn't the easiest subject, but most couples indulge. Have you tried other positions, getting high or tipsy, candles & slowing down, reading an erotic poem or story to each other. Something to take your mind off the pain. How about a spa bath together. While these are not panaceas maybe just loving cuddling & play.
I do not want to discount your pain, it is a hideous monster in your life, I just want offer you some hope.
I have issues with this subject, too. I try so hard to keep the loving connection so we don't start resenting each other. This is a huge part of the way a man keeps connected to a woman.
Sorry to be so long winded. Please don't be offended.🌹

Jul 08, 2016 8:17 PM

I started a thread similar to this, look it up it was called
Sex-Disability and chronic pain...😊

Jul 09, 2016 3:20 PM

S cross your, there are sex lounge chairs that you can look into. I've heard about them in my sexy zebras group in Facebook. They're made to support the joints.....good luck!

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