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Life changing decisions

Sep 26, 2016 5:15 AM

I recently got results form my latest scan, mostly stuff i already knew but there was more. Herniated disc's pressing on nerves, osteoarthritis and the recent development degenerative disc disease.
I go home to talk with my husband about having another child, I'm 26 and already have a 2 year old.
I say to him that if we were to have a second child it would have to be soon as my condition will get worse with time.
Not a week earlier he was saying 'it would be nice to have a girl' and he felt like 'something was missing'. All of a sudden now that there is a time limit he's saying he 'doesn't know' and he's 'happy with just one child' and 'maybe we should stay with one'.
I have no idea what to think, or what to do.
Regardless or whether i want another or not it all come down to his decision but he his giving me nothing.
How do i get him to have a serious conversation about me getting off my pain medication and actually making a decision?

Sep 26, 2016 12:02 PM

McKnight, I started with the same problems you mentioned at age 29, and I'm 54 now. I've had 3 separate spinal fusions in the neck, but haven't addressed the back yet. I had 2 children before I knew any of my spine issues existed. But knowing wouldn't have made me say no, although I know my hubby may have felt different.

Is it possible he's afraid of what another pregnancy might do to you pain wise, that it might end up causing you more spinal pain, and he'd rather settle for one child than to have you suffer more pain? Maybe he's afraid of the added pain for you trying to care for two children. Just set up the opportunity for the two of you to talk uninterrupted, by having someone babysit... Have a date night. Hugs love and prayers you both can talk it out and decide what's best for all! 🙂💕🙏🌸

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