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Pain and anxiety crap

Nov 27, 2016 2:59 PM

I've felt soo bad the last few days....my face pain on my left side was off the scale, it also is starting to be on more painful on my right side more frequently now as well!!! My neck, shoulders and the whole of my back have been soo painful I was in absolute agony that it's also started to go down to my hips and legs. I had to go to my cousins little boy's birthday party yesterday and the hour drive there, 5 hours we spent there and the hour drive home just added to the pain (after the party we went back to hers and it was an absolute joy seeing my two play with their 3 year old cousin that made the time, drive and pain worth it).
I've been in tears with the pain pretty much since this morning and just want to give up but my two baby's are my life and I won't do that to them.
I had my baby girl walk on my back....she's 10 years old and just over 8st, a little overweight but mainly in proportion (she's about 5ft tall and a UK size 6 shoe, the same shoe size as me and I'm 5ft 4in).....it hurt like hell but felt soo good then I had her stand just below my shoulder blades and really dig her heals in, both of us could feel the knots in my muscles as she was doing it, it was soo painful but felt soo good at the same time!!! She stopped doing it when she noticed I was starting to bruise but I didn't want her to stop because it felt like she was actually starting to get some of the knots out of my shoulders plus it didn't even feel like she was causing any bruising!!!!
Between the pain and the anxiety life is a living hell and I'm just trying to muddle thro the bad hoping that things will get better very soon 😢

Nov 27, 2016 10:23 PM

Painsomnia in full swing, even after extra painkillers and a kalms nighttime so I'm looking back over some of the pictures I took yesterday.....the one in the yellow fireman's helmet is my very bright 14 year old playing with my cousins little boy who just turned 3. My son said he sent a message to his friends saying he was wearing the helmet and they asked why his response was "why not?"
He may be growing up but he loves playing with all his nieces and nephews and they all love him, he will go down to their level and really get involved in whatever they want to do and of course wind them up and tease them as well which makes them all properly laugh and want to be with him all the more....he says playing with them means he can pretend to be a little kid again!

Nov 28, 2016 2:39 AM

When kids are playing with kids. I don't think there are "levels" they're all just kids enjoying each other's company. I am dealing with painsomnia as well and it does heighten the anxiety.. however, my BFF is right by my side as always and I'm going to drift out. Hang in there, it will get better. {{Hugs}}

Nov 28, 2016 5:04 AM

Beautiful moments! I'm glad you were able to part despite your pain! I know how hard it is! My kids used to walk on my back when they were young! It's the best! I'm blaming my current flare on the weather! I hope you come up to a reasonable level soon! 💖

Nov 28, 2016 5:25 AM

Thank you Alwayz and Mich your words mean the world to me. I try to see the joy and blessings in each day and most of them come from my kids, they are my world and I will get thro this low with them at my side xx

Nov 28, 2016 10:39 AM

No matter how bad I feel I always enjoy seeing my boys have fun with friends or enjoy when we go out as a family..that's an adorable picture.. I hope you found some relief and got some rest..

Nov 28, 2016 11:28 AM

Gentle hugs Sezzy ... Sending you some virtual cheesecake and a cuppa!

Nov 28, 2016 3:34 PM

Sezzy, I'm always happy to be of assistance if I can. Sending {{{Hugs}}}💕

Nov 28, 2016 4:41 PM

Mominfl I try to see the blessings and joy and my kids are my greatest joys and help me to keep muddling thri as best I can....

Foggurl I've eaten that virtual cheese cake and cuppa all in one go.....I could quite happily go out for more but my waistline won't appreciate it!!! Lol the milk chocolate coins I bought for the kids went down a treat this afternoon as well lol

Alwayz thank you the support I've had here and my two babies has stopped me from falling too far into the darkness....if I'd felt on my own because trying to speak with family, they don't understand and say to push thro etc....I don't think I would be able to be holding up as well.
Having people understand and not judge me about it is such a blessing and to be able to really say how I'm feeling helps get it out so I can process everything a little better. Altho I'm still on that dam emotional roller coaster and high pain levels don't make for easy living!!!
Thank you everyone for understanding xxx hugz to you all and I hope your all having an easy pain day/night xx

Nov 29, 2016 11:08 AM

Hugz pondy I love u... U r strongest person I met in a very long time... I'm sorry u feel like shat...

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