Okay, so I normally don't say this aloud, but since I have switched over to this new gyn, I have not had even one freak out at the docs office since late June. Not one time, and with me being an assault survivor, that is an absolute bloody miracle. It used to be bad enough at one point, that I would not go into the back office by myself at all. Since I've switched, I can go willingly in the office and tolerate just about everything they throw at me(key word is just about). I still will not go in there without another person for moral support for my annual exam((tmi, I know). It's amazing. I think it has taken 2 things for me. The first being a lot of courage, and the second being somebody that makes you feel safe. And no, I have not had a nightmare either since that time. Sorry, just needed to get that off my chest and say that I'm really proud of myself right now.