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Sad realisation

Jan 13, 2020 6:04 AM

Today it really hit me. I am in a terrible position in life and there is no way out.
Unless I magically get better, which let's face it, just does not happen, things are likely to get much worse.
My life long Dr retired recently and the replacement Dr only allows 10 mins per appointment at a cost of almost $40.
I'm never going to get any answers for my numerous complex health complaints at this rate.
I have not one single person to turn to. And there is not a single thing I can do about it.
Unfortunately I find this forum doesn't offer any reasonable advice, just gives me a place to unload, which I'm sure people don't appreciate.

Jan 13, 2020 9:59 PM

Katpain, you feel free to unload anytime. We are here to support each of through good & bad. This is a safe place to unload, to people who understand what other chronic pain sufferers are going through; no judgement here. Can you remind me a little bit about what you're dealing with. I may be thinking of someone else but you aren't an adult yet are you? If that's so, it's a roadblock in itself.

I've been where you are, under new doctors who don't want to take the necessary time to really listen to their patients, so they can treat each of us based on our own individual needs. When I've gotten under a doctor that just doesn't sit well or give me "really cares" vibes, I search for a new one, or at the least get a second opinion, sometimes a third. That may not be an option for you, based on your finances or insurance regulations & govt oversight. I have to leave my PCP this year, once my hip surgery is done. I've been one of his first 20 patients when he got started over 30+ years ago. But his care over the past 5 years has been lazy, talk over me, not listen & put very little effort into trying to help at all: I'd have left last year had it not been for my first hip surgery that unfortunately failed. And now I need a total health clearance for the hip replacement; you can't go to a new doctor for that.

My oldest sister's doctors have yanked all her pain meds & muscle relaxers, based on govt guidelines, and cut her gabapentin in half. She's turned to more homeopathic treatment options. Unfortunately she may have recently fractured or ruptured a spinal disc and that can't be treated homeopathic treatment, but hopefully it won't require surgery. She has me taking some Elderberry gummies & Oscillocillinum (spelling questionable) to try and get over this bronchitis faster & build my immunity, especially since I turned sicker overnight.

Sadly, you are correct that there is no magic pill to make any of our chronic illnesses go away. That's why we have to try all kinds of methods to get any relief we can. Dietary changes are proven to be beneficial, based on each individual. And for me, with sjogrens, fibromyalgia, CTD and OA, gentle morning, midday & nighttime stretches are a must, because immobility creates stiffness. I'm also trying to do 15-30 minutes of ergonomic bike ride (stationary with a chair type seat) at least 2-3x a week; I want to retain the strength my recent PR helped me build up. I recently found out that from favoring my bad hip over a year, barely making normal steps, the muscles in the whole leg & buttock were drawing tight and have required me to stretch just to put on my clothes, socks & shoes. Now I know why my Dad couldn't dress easily with hip hip & knee! Many here use CBD oil & ointments, and some use marajuna (MJ), or Kratom. It's illegal here, but I wouldn't do MJ anyway with having asthma. So far I've not found a good CBD product, though we have shops popping up everywhere.

Think about things you haven't tried and see if making a few little changes can help, and that includes doc-shopping if possible. You aren't in this alone; though we differ in ailments or age we all understand. Hugs love & prayers you get a good night's rest!πŸ˜Šβ€πŸ™πŸŒΌ

Jan 14, 2020 2:33 PM

Sorry but pain is what it isπŸ™„πŸ™„ one has to manage it. Soley to suit yourself. Manage one day at a time. Or even an hour at a time. Do stuff thats helpfel and pleasing. One can choose to do negative stuff or positive stuff. Its not easy and different for everyone. Lets face it life is hard enough without illness. Its hard difficult and down right depressing and draining so rest when you need and pace. One thing at a time... life is like lots of boxes. So open only one box at any time finish it or action it but then close it. Make life as simple as possible. However its not easy at all.. all the best😊

Jan 15, 2020 6:40 AM

FlappysLady81, thank you for your encouraging words.
I'm in my 40's and have worked as a labourer most of my life after joining the workforce at 14, currently in commercial cleaning.
My diagnosis are fibromyalgia, osteoarthritis in numerous body parts especially the neck, bulging discs in the cervical and lumbar, stenosis causing arm pain, chronic migraines, chronic sinus, numerous mental health diagnosis and am currently healing from my second surgery on a broken arm (which is now infected). Oh and have an intolerance to wheat products!
Before breaking my arm I was working between 4-6hrs pw and that's if I turned up to work. I found the migraines and chronic pain /fatigue caused me to have alot of time off even with such short hours.
Now I have to deal with ongoing problems with my arm.
I guess it was my recent Dr's appointment that shook me so bad.
He literally said "you've only got a 10minute consult, I haven't got time for that! "
All I asked for was a letter to see a specialist and a wound check. He was so rude. And that's the Dr who replaced my Dr whom I've seen since birth.
My original Dr tried getting me on disability but centrelink refused due to my husband's wage. He works 50-60hrs per week to get us by. I still can't afford the medical bills. I certainly can't afford homeopathic treatment.
I'm afraid any new Dr I go to will refuse my regular medication like what has happened to your sister. And they will just refer me to an expensive specialist.
Dr shopping is difficult when you have a huge record and numerous complex conditions.
Thank you so much for not making me feel bad for venting. I don't do it much, I don't like to stress my husband out!
I hope for all of us, that somebody fugues out a cure for chronic pain.

Jan 15, 2020 6:43 AM

Grogg,
"It is what it is ", actually one of my most commonly used sayings πŸ˜‚
I know. It is what it is.
I just felt I was going a bit crazy and really needed to vent.
Thank you for your response.

Jan 15, 2020 2:09 PM

Lol katpain, I took decades off your age! We have a lot in common, diagnoses. Did you apply for disability through an attorney? The first time I didnt but my second time I did & won. They didnt even take my hubby's income into consideration; it was based on my last 3-5 years of my income.

Jan 15, 2020 6:27 PM

Thank you so much, that's really interesting.
I'm wondering though, did it cost you alot to use an attorney?
Thank you xx

Jan 16, 2020 1:25 AM

Katpain, you confused me when you said you can't get disability because of the number of hours your husband works. His hours should not have anything to do with your disability. But let me say I am sorry for your pain. I am sorry also for the physician you have who has the "god" complex instead of realizing he is in the helping profession. He puts his pants on like everyone else. I would ask the billing department for a price list. If you request one they have to provide one to you. You have to empower yourself. Don't take that doctor's word for it that you only have 10 minutes for $40. That absurd! Go with your information already written down. Ask the nurse the things the nurse can answer and save the things only the doctor can answer for the doctor. If you have Case management with your insurance utilize that service.
I have found there have been some pretty good advice from the people here who are chronic pain sufferers. I'm thankful for this forum.
But I think I hear you saying you are grieving the loss of your lifelong physician. That's tough. I recently had a my physician I was really close to relocate 4 hours away. I can't imagine how you must feel trying to cope with losing a physician who knew you so well. Keep in mind you are your best advocate. It just sounds like your frustrated by your situation right now. I say this to you and myself.... tomorrow will bring different views.

Jan 16, 2020 4:31 AM

MySistersKeeper,
I don't know what country you're in, but in Australia your partners income is definitely taken into account when applying for any social security, especially disability.
I have no health 'insurance ' at all.
And all general practitioners provide a 10 min consult, if you need longer you need to book a double appointment at extra cost.
My old Dr always bulk billed me which meant that I didn't pay a cent. And he never cut me off at 10 mins! I didn't even know about the 10 min rule until now.
Some Dr's are completely bulk billed however you still have 10 mins and they are more inclined to refuse you as a patient because you're too complex and need a specialist (min $200 for any specialist).
It really is a joke.
Don't get me wrong, I'm very grateful for what we do have, and am not always negative like this, it just hit me hard.
I've had a few run ins with rude Dr's but this guy takes the cake.
I have zero confidence (actually a diagnosis!) and don't feel like I can stand up for myself at all.
I feel like a child that needs someone to wrap me up and take care of me 😒
So pathetic.
Thank you for your comments.

Jan 16, 2020 2:16 PM

Katpain, I’m really sorry your having to endure so much Not only physically but emotionally as well. It awful that they limit your time spent with your doctor to such a small amount of time. Since I started going to my pain management doctor my PCP
(primary care physician) limits my time and gets testy if I comment at all about my spine etc. what good are they? I hope you can soon get the appropriate care you so deserve. I’ll be praying that your arm heals quickly. πŸ™πŸ€—πŸ˜˜πŸ’•

Jan 16, 2020 8:24 PM

Katpain, the attorney took only a percentage that is allowed by law. Unfortunately I don't remember the amount.

Jan 16, 2020 11:57 PM

Painwarriror,
Thank you.
I'm sorry to hear that you're in a similar position. I don't think Dr's really understand just how much people with chronic illness rely on them. They are the ones we are meant to be able to turn to. πŸ˜•

Jan 16, 2020 11:58 PM

FlappysLady81,
Thank you for the advice, I will look into it.

Jan 25, 2020 4:32 AM

i can only wish you all the best and good luck.. yep it is wahat it is lol.. and that is awful. Chin up.. ok venting..πŸ‘πŸ˜

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