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Sheltered

Dec 20, 2015 6:52 PM

You never know how sheltered you are
Until the sight of fear
Becomes a newspaper
Slapping you in the face
Forcing you to awaken

When your friend's situation
Becomes somehow your own
Unable to bear the weight of these shadows
Liquid quicksand
Catching in your throat

Blood is no longer safe here
Years I've fought just to belong
Meaning nothing now

I'm growing up a bit too fast
From safety to freedom
Falling into exile
A simple tribute to the lack of betrayal
Throw down my crown
Shatter the throne where I once sat by your side
Looking down on anything
Staring wide eyed
Up at you

Our home isn't ours
It belongs to the family
Every broken part
The repainted walls
The dented doors
Bony nails glaring right into your heavy duty soul
Toilet laughing every time you try to sit
Roaring rotations of the fan
Growling water socket barely running
Caving in ceiling
Falling with me to the ground
Without a sound

Cars no longer care
I don't dare say I'll be anywhere in time
Dead cars don't judge
They bend and they brake
Ache, take, break
Spill an oily lake down the driveway
We don't even own that
Boiling down my bones until they become broth
Nothing matters

You never know how sheltered you were
Walls
Wrecking balls carving into the dust
Rush to the end of the story
Where everything's alright
This isn't a story
I have no light to edge out the darkness
My reasons to be missed
Have since been wrought with mold
Should I give a damn
I'm not sure I can

---
Sorry if this is vague, just processing. I'm getting to...put off a flare? It managed to come up last night, my stupid flare. I thought I was going to die from pain, but I think I just have some sort of flu ish thing. ...

Dec 21, 2015 3:57 AM

Ferretbandit, your writings are amazingly poignant and powerful. Your words touch the soul and also open a window into your life. You have been through so very much in your young life. You're a very strong young lady and I have to say that I am really impressed by how you handle yourself. The way you come so quickly to the aid of others when you yourself are in a flare or having other difficulties. I'm glad that we have gotten to get to know each other here. You are really a wonderful young lady and I hope that your flare doesn't last too long. Sending you positive vibes and gentle {{{{Hugs}}}}💕🌻🙏🏻

Dec 21, 2015 8:50 PM

Ferretbandit, Reading your words, I felt as if I were in your eyes looking out. You are wise beyond your years, and have been through so much. I hope and pray your flare, or flu, will be short lived this time. And I pray 2016 will be a much better year for you and your family. (((Hugs))) 🙂🙏🌼

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