My health, as of late, has been appalling. For nine–hell, nearly ten months now, I’ve been in widespread musculoskeletal pain. It ranges from mildly irritating to thought-consuming. Sharp, throbbing. It could last a fee seconds or it could last an hour. It has no rhyme or reason.
At bedtime, my legs are restless. When I get up in the morning, my hips pop. Muscle spasm and trembling hands. Some days, the gym is a piece of cake; others, I can barely get through a set.
A week ago I went to my second doctor with this problem. The first disregarded me and based on bloodwork requested that I take B12 and Vitamin D. If there was an improvement, it was not marked. I’m still taking them, hoping it has an effect. This second doctor tests me for Lyme, ANA , etc.
ANA is the only one that comes back positive.
A test came back positive and all at once I was relieved and scared.
“Finally,” I thought, “Some answers!”
Then– “ Holy shit… I might get answers.”
Nothing is worse than living in diagnosis limbo. And until I see the rhumetologist in July, that is where I must pitch my tent.
I am all at once afraid and eager. And I am so tired of waiting.