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Stressing !!!

Apr 07, 2015 3:43 PM

Hi all I had to bring my daughter to Labor and Delivery today so they could monitor the baby and her blood pressure. She has been very noncompliance with bed rest, she is 34 weeks. She saw her OB,he put her on blood pressure medicine on Monday and he told her to please try and stay in bed. Well she didn't get home until 3pm and left again to go with me to go to yoga and her father in laws to take her fiancé little girl somethings,we didn't get home until 7pm. If I say anything to her she gets mad and her blood pressure goes up. I asked her this morning what her blood pressure was and she got mad, at lunch I called to see if she could come up here at 2 pm they she needed to eat a good meal before she came,I told her what they said and asked her what she'd wanted to eat she got mad, I asked her if she wanted me to fix her a couple grill cheese sandwiches and she went off on me then they left. I don't know what I'm going to do she's going to make me have a nervous break down, worrying about her and the baby,being ok. She wants me with her here at the hospital because she's scared, I was going to the waiting room to give her Dad an update when I was leaving I kissed her head and told her that I love her even if she has been a toot. Sorry for the long text.

Apr 07, 2015 3:59 PM

Weezie, it sounds like she's in between being adult enough to be responsible for another (or herself) and yet she wants to be an adult to make her own decisions. I say back off and let her do as she pleases. Make sure she understands you love her and will support her, but you're not her maid or nanny. That this baby is her responsibility.

When my oldest got pregnant and the "dad" kicked her out of his house, she came home. She wasn't able to work because of the placenta issue. When the baby was about 3-4 weeks old she decided to go on a date. She ended up drinking too much and (yes we had a curfew for a 21 yr old) she came home polluted & late. The baby woke up throwing up and she wanted to hold her. I forbid it and told her "go sleep it off. In the morning we'll discuss this." The next day, after keeping the baby away for 12 hours, she apologized. I told her if she ever did anything to endanger that baby again I'd call dfcs. She knew I meant it. She's turned her life around and is a wonderful caring mother. But like most, she had to sow her wild oats first.

Let your daughter know you love her and the baby, but you're not going to hold her hand. If she wants to be an adult, prove it by being responsible for herself and the baby. I don't mean to sound harsh, but sometimes tough love is necessary. I'm praying for you and your family. 🙏🌼

Apr 07, 2015 4:26 PM

Weezie I think flappySlady81 is right. And your in our prayers also

Apr 07, 2015 8:07 PM

Yeah Weez, it's too much to be walking on eggshells all the time. Maybe as she is monitored in the hospital you can make it perfectly clear that your concerns are serious and point out where she is so that proves the point. Then after that it's up to her. I feel for you, my oldest worried me to death for several years but ahhhh she has finally reached optimal executive function brain development ( usually the bulb comes on around 24-30). And she is now a wonderful mother and very smart young lady. Sending good mojo to you

Apr 07, 2015 10:06 PM

Thanks everyone, the Dr put her on complete bed rest , she is only allowed up to go to the bathroom, 1 shower a day, she has to drink 64 oz water a day because her aminatic fluid is low which puts the baby in danger of getting wrapped up in the umbilical cord. So if the baby stops moving like she has been moving to come to the hospital immediately. The nurse came in and really talked to her. I am hoping that she listens to her. She's been in bed since 5 pm that I know of but we had to run and get something for our dinner because I was so tired when we got home.
She is 29 will turn 30 May 21. I'm beginning to think she's never going to grow up . I'm not trying to make excuses for her she had a learning disability,and we had to fight with the school district to get her into regular classes. She was held back in first grade because she couldn't write her name and her printing was horrible and so is her cursive. I tried to get them to test her for disgraphia but they wouldn't we weren't financially able to have it done. I pushed her to learn how to be able to take care of her business, and how to cook and clean house. She turned out to be a pretty good cook,and housekeeper until I got hurt and couldn't do anything anymore. I don't know what happened with her. If I ask her and she just sits and stares at me and not say anything when I continue to talk and try to get her to tell me she gets mad at me.

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