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The silent killer

Jul 02, 2016 7:31 PM

Pain ,pain, they seem to call you the silent killer the white wolf for the reason that you sneak up on us with your disease that's worst then cancer...at least they have a cur

e for it our pain is unbearable that there is nothing they can do....you try everything they tell you what others give you as a advice to try to elevate the pain but with no avail to receive relief....oh my what do I do ....give me some relief oh my .....no one can understand what we go through until they walk in our shoes ...so now I may seem to be with no conscious to have empaty to anyone that is Ill not even a person that has aid this illness is worst then aids and cancer put together...so if you see me or hear me moaning and crying when I am asleep don't feel sorry me just keave me alone it will subside so i continue on my way that is my life of living in pain 24/7 without no relief .....the disease is making me have a black heart but in the other hand I wouldn't be the strong person I am right now that cry for others that are sick ........j/s

Jul 03, 2016 6:37 AM

Hi there, I know exactly what you're going through. You are not alone and I'm exactly where you are at now. Ever since my car accidents - I have not been without pain - 24/7. I have stopped talking about it to my friends as they don't understand - they think it's all in my mind but the pain is real because I feel it. I can only talk about it to my partner and daughter and I hate seeing them feeling hopeless because that can't do anything. I know exactly how you feel but if tomorrow is a new day. Perhaps the pain is still there but your thinking will change with the new day. Thinking now of you X

Jul 03, 2016 9:50 AM

I just write to vent but in the other hand sometimes I do think like that ...if you are a child and I'll I have sympathy for them but if you are an adult I need to change the way i think sometimes but for reals a lot of people use the pity card and expect for people to feel sorry for themselves to get what they want now those people I can not will not those are the ones that irritate me.....I have friends that know my illness is real.....I just vent .....πŸ˜†

Jul 04, 2016 9:13 AM

Hil66, I think everyone of us on here have been where you are, where it seems you can't see anything past the horizon filled with pain. Don't feel bad because it makes you feel so negative. I think that's just a natural reaction for all of us. It's better to vent and get it out than to hold it in. That just causes stress. And this community is the safe place to get it out without being judged.

Last night was a very rough night for me, and today my knee is trying to buckle again as I walk. We had our granddaughters so my hubby & I were in the same bed. I'm afraid i may have kept him awake from my tossing, turning, & up/down through the night. I'm hoping today won't be so bad, as nights are usually my worst.

Just take each day as it comes. Enjoy the good times and rest in the bad times. We all feel you. And when it seems pain is overwhelming, think about one of those grandchildren. We were telling our granddaughters about my upcoming neck surgery and how is be in a neck brace. My youngest said, "Granny, you can put my tv tray on top of the table so you can see your food when you eat. That's what my GrandPapa did." I smiled and said what a smart idea she had! Hugs & prayers today will be a little better for you! πŸŽ†πŸ™‚πŸ’•πŸ™πŸŒΌπŸŽ‡

Jul 05, 2016 8:59 AM

Wow, Hil66, understand how you feel and just as a suggestion you might want to look up a good counselor. Losing empathy is tragic..i am sorry you feel this way. I know that the pain gain drain the life out of us , it can lead to major depression, suicidal ideation, and isolation. You mentioned that you have a group of people in your life that know you and believe you. I am relieved to know you have support and love. Venting is great, writing is a wonderful tool. I hope it helps you improve your emotional state. I hope that anyone suffering from. Deep depression because of chronic pain, reads this post , and breathes in and out , remember you are not alone. Much love and Blessings,Terri

Jul 05, 2016 10:10 PM

Hi , Terrirulesnotmy pain.....I am not depressed I have lived with this illness for 49 ,years ...the things I write are not how I feel it is how others feel and I can comprehend how they feel....because I have been there and still going through the pain the only difference is I speak the reality if how one feels trapped within this illness.....thank you for your respond but those words I wrote do not come from a depress person ...I have been told by a doctor that I have no symptoms of depression...thank you for your concern.....

Jul 06, 2016 11:56 AM

You are most welcome,I did not realize you were a writer/poet. Now I get it................

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