Bless you, Sweetheart. Just try hold in there, I was like you 4-5 years ago bcause my body seemed to really hate me & I wasn't getting anywhere with my Dr's other than go see this Rheumatologist then (I find out through getting my notes from my Dr that bcause I smoked, which I stopped 3 years ago now!!, he was blaming that for my Issues) getting sent to another one and no sort of help so I again asked to see a Top Rheumatologist nearest to me & I got to see a great Mr (Felt like he took me seriously & put me thorough testing, EVERYTHING that could be tested with 9 vials of blood!!) he put me on a Anti-Malaria but this affected my Eye sight, then gave me a Tablet form of Small Dose Chemo but my Liver started to fail so I'm now on the Injection form & touch wood so far no side effects but now he's retired he has put me in the hands of his Team who have just asked if I can be a test subject for the rest of my life, another thing that set me back was that 2 1/2 year ago my Auntie/2nd Mum died of Cancer through negligence!!! Hurt so bad still but I know she would've kicked my backside if I didn't fight for the correct answers 😄 Sweetheart, please ask for a 2nd or even a 3rd opinion!!! I know it seems like nothing is going your way but don't give up just yet 😢 Also, if your own Dr is messing you around then report them & also see if there's a better Surgery/Health Centre near you & join them, I know it's a hassle but if they have neglected you in anyway then your New Dr/Specialist should let you know??!! Please keep in touch my e-mail is email@example.com if you need a chat, if I don't get back to you straight away then I will be in touch ASAP 😊
Freedomserenity, have you ever heard of EFT ( emotional freedom technique )? It is a very simple technique that you can do on yourself and you can learn it quickly. There is a free manual online and also videos of how to do it on YouTube. I think it would really help you because most physical ailments have an emotional component too. I have seen people get amazing results with it. It was originally used for fears/phoboas, traumas, PTSD, etc and then found to also help pain. I hope this helps you.
You can go to www.eftfree.net I'm sorry you feel as though you're losing yourself Nanaimo. Reach out to friends and community. There are many people on here that are probably going through similar things to what you are. One caution though, try to find positive people to talk to. It's hard to get out of a funk if you're always talking to or hanging out with negative people.