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Feb 10, 2016 9:42 PM

Hi all... I'm fairly new here. I haven't written my own post yet... But... Today is the day. I need to vent... Maybe get some insight from others???
I've been living with chronic back pain, fibro, IBS, and migraines for what seems like forever. For the last 7 years I have managed to push myself to keep working. A couple months ago I turned in FMLA paperwork to my job for protection. I've gone from a type A personality to a shadow of my former self. It's been a long, painful, and exhausting journey. 10 years ago, I was the type of employee that barely called out of work... If I called out 3 times a year, it was a lot!!! Now??? 3 times a month is my average. :(
A couple months ago I had a conversation with my brother. He was advising me to apply for SSDI... I told him that I can't... I have to work... I have a mortgage... Bills... Kids and our disabled mother depending on me and my income to survive. He said... You're going to cripple yourself... I shrugged my shoulders and said... I just don't know what to do. Well... Today... The choice was made for me... Actually... A week ago today. Lifting a 50lb bag of onions at work, I damaged my back more. I didn't know I had until the next day when I was in more pain than normal.... Still, I just thought I strained it. So I do what I always do, rest and heat. Normally that works... I go back to my normal pain level and return to work. Not this time. I went to see my pain doctor who wouldn't touch me until I reported the incident to my job. So that is what I did today.
I'm scared....

Feb 10, 2016 9:56 PM

Well. First. Welcome to the family. I'm.glad you trusted us enough to tell us your story..secondly, that conversation yiunhad with your brother sounds exse what me and my sister spoke on last year when I was fighting off pneumonia. Ended up in the hospital twoce for a total of three weeks hospitalized. And still not totally knowing what else was going on. I got done with pneumonia and was still having unrelated pain and symptoms that the Dr could not slove. I was like you I was determined to work. To get better and nkt stop my life.
The decision to stop working nis hard. I did take her advise I'm not gonna say the process is easy nor its gonna short. It's stressful and frustrating but once you get to the end youl be happy u did it..I'm still waiting for my process to end but if u end up.hurting yourself like I did to where u could nkt go back to work you'll still be in the same position. I'm not telling u what to do but I'm saying you should weigh all your options and do what's best for you.

Feb 10, 2016 10:02 PM

Thank you.. I've been working with 5 herniated/bulging discs, scoliosis, DDD, osteo arthritis in my neck for the last 7 years or so... Along with the other issues. I went to the doctor yesterday for a bote to return to work!!! I do believe I herniated at least 2 more discs in my lumbar region with this last incident... I have no idea what is going to happen from here on out... With the type A personality... Also comes being in control... I am way out of my element

Feb 10, 2016 10:06 PM

I hate to tell you..if yiu are a control tyoe person this road is gonna be rough ..its hard either way but I too had an issue letting go. This pain journey is tough I'm glad you found us. And I hope your road is easier then most.

Feb 10, 2016 10:10 PM

Yes... I know it is... Thank you again :)

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