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Why do people think they have the right to judge me!

Oct 22, 2016 10:25 AM

I'm so fed up of "you can't be that bad, you don't look ill" and "you'll be fine if you just pull yourself together" or "don't let the stress get at you, let it go over your head"
My dad is the worse one for this

Oct 22, 2016 10:57 AM

If someone hasn't experienced the kind of pain you do they won't understand. Also because we are in pain all the time what people think 💭 looks normal is really us hurting and they don't see it anymore. Please try not to allow people's opinions and comments upset 😭 you. You know how you feel even when they don't and it's not their fault they can't relate to what you are going through. For now just breathe and don't let it get to you the best you can. ((Many Blessings))

Oct 23, 2016 5:59 PM

Ctesgo thank you, I know I shouldn't let it bother me especially as I know my dad thinks he's giving "helpful" advise. He's a great believer in just pushing thro because that's how he was brought up. There was a time when he had tinitus intermittently and he did ask how I've lived with it for soo long (I've had since I was 16 constantly with no break and now I'm 36!). My mum understands because she had spondylitis in her neck for about 15 years and dad used to say the same sort of things to her as well but now he's seen her bad days he doesn't say it quite as much to her!
Sometimes it's hard to not let his comments hurt especially as I'm in a bad flair up and my anxiety is also high.
Thank you and I hope you have a peaceful week xx

Oct 24, 2016 2:59 PM

Sezzy, it's very hard for others to grasp the full effect unless they've gone through it. I've been suffering with tinnitus and vertigo on & off since 2007. In 2015 they diagnosed a cranial 8 nerve issue affecting my imbalance. About 2 weeks ago I woke up with severe tinnitus, low pitch roaring & high pitch squeal in my left ear. Then last Monday I noticed I couldn't hear as well, so I went to the doctor. They diagnosed further hearing loss in both ears: mild on the right but moderate in the left ear. She said sometimes a virus can attack the nerves in the rear and cause sudden symptoms so they're treating me as if I have one. When I was watching TV later with my hubby I asked him if he ever had tinnitus with his hearing loss, and he said no. I told him, "Well I'm not suicidal, but it's so bad I can certainly understand why you cousin committed suicide, because this is driving me nuts!" He looked at me a second, shrugged, then went back to watching TV. So, he nor other family members, may not understand, but I do and so do the rest of the community members. Sending you hugs love and prayers of support! 🙂💕🙏🌸

Oct 25, 2016 12:49 AM

Oh no Flappys, that is awful. You've really been thro a lot of stress the last few weeks.
You're in my prayers and I'm sending you {{{BIG GENTLE LOVING HUGS}}}
I've been lucky that since I've had tinitus I haven't had any hearing loss but when I get stressed the ringing goes from a low pitched fire alarm in my left ear to a high pitched screaming alarm in both ears and I've suffered with vertigo probably from the same time as I got the tinitus. Everything gets worse.

I hope and pray that your stress eases up for you and things will settle so you can rest and recover as much as possible for you xx

Oct 25, 2016 12:51 AM

I don't know what happened to my sentence but it was meant to say everything gets worse when I'm stressed.
Painssomnia brain I think!!!!

Oct 25, 2016 1:31 AM

I have the same issue with Tinnitus and vertigo, also in my left ear.....if you've never had tinnitus people can't understand how devastating it can be. Thinking of you both 😊

Oct 25, 2016 2:29 PM

When my TMJ was diagnosed I told the doctor that I was dealing with tinitus and hearing loss in my left ear. I've always had awesome hearing (good thing I can actually read lips.. as a dear friend of mine can tell you.. LOL!!😉). When he checked everything, he pressed on my jaw and I couldn't even open my mouth.. LOL!! I know some people that would love me to keep it shut for good🙄 but, fuck em, I will always say what's on my mind and I have no filters so oh well.. Oh right... tinitus. (Got off on bit of a tantrum almost 😜). I always have to have background noise even when I try to sleep or the ringing is ALL I hear and when the TMJ flares, my ear feels blocked and my balance is off and I get dizzy.. not a fun trip either (especially when you end up on the floor when you're trying to have a proper conversation with a friend.. LOL😜😉). Hope they find something to help at least a little bit 💕

Oct 25, 2016 3:42 PM

Jahmac you are soo right people don't understand how it truly affects your life. Unfortunately I've had it constantly from the age of 16 and over the last 4 or 5 years the ringing has got worse and each spell of vertigo has got longer and the dizziness is getting worse each time as well. Some of it is probably the meds I'm on but a lot of it is stress from the illnesses and issues I have but try telling a doctor that and they just fob me off with its the meds!!!!

Oct 25, 2016 3:54 PM

Alwayz I'm really sorry that you're having to cope with tinitus and hearing loss, it's no consolation but you are lucky you can lip read.
Even tho I don't have hearing loss I do have problems where if there's a lot of background noise I can't understand what people say to me, I can hear you speaking but I can't hear the words you're saying as it gets lost with all the other noise. On the other hand if it's dead quiet in the house I can hear the slightest noise!
Sometimes background noise like a TV being on or music playing actually anoys me and makes the ringing worse so I switch it off and and have silence especially if I'm feeling rough with my issues and I just go to sleep!

Oct 25, 2016 3:56 PM

You're both in my prayers xx

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