Ive just been asked by my dr. To keep a journal. However, i hate to focus anymore on my pain than I'm already forced too. I try to distract myself from it because i tend to get ddepressed when i focus on how Iintense my pain is and how it is limiting my life. There are so many limitations and most of the time i try to find ways from telling people I'm limited or in pain because i came from a family who taught me that succumbing to pain was to be weak. Maybe the journal will help me at least learn to verbalize how i feel.
I felt the same way you do. It seemed like the more I focused on my pain the worse it got. But that was a misperception. The pain didn't get worse because I tracked it. My shotty memory had played tricks on me, making me forget details about my pain that qpuld have bee important to tell my doctor three months ago. And I'm just now able to accurately explain what's going on.
I am and conflucted myself in regards to tracking my pain in. Journal..... I felt as though my doctor wanted me to right a journal because he didn't believe what I told him...., it's like the more medications I try .... (Which all seem to feel) the less the doctors believe the extent of my pain!!!! And I also do not want a record of how o truly feel because the more I look back on it... The more it depresses me .... Either because o missed out on sonething.... Wasn't able to do something ... Or how I lied about saying "I'm great!!!" Wirh a fake smile on my face! I often question if I will ever see a "pain free" day ever again!
By keeping a journal you may find a trigger that increases your pain. For me I have also changed my diet and realized that sugar increases my pain. Also I have known for years that weather is a huge issue. I can predict storms and temperature changed better than any meteorologist. If you have a doctor that does not listen to you it is time for a change, unless you want that type of relationship. When I journal it is not to focus on the obvious I know I hurt. I use the journal as my way of purging the I cannot deal with this any longer thoughts. Hope this is useful.
Call your journal anything you like. It is more about getting it out and not keeping everything locked in your head. The big thing for me is absolute privacy - when I write it is raw, that is how I get it out. It is a fact that living in pain changes you. The privacy part is there have been times where I have written "if this is going to be my life I would rather be dead" I would rather my daughter did not ever read that. That is just how I feel sometimes. Writing it just gets the thought out and I dump it. Rather than acting on it.Yes, I look for anything that may be a pain trigger like I wrote in earlier post. As always- I hope this helps some one.