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Wondering if the joy will come back

Oct 22, 2015 2:25 AM

So I've been going through this for a few months now. I'm two weeks post op and still not feeling near myself
I'm fact I even find the laughter ofy family irritating. I don't see the end of this and now I'm not on any meds and I feel horrible. So being happy is very difficult for me
I use to.be bubble and joyful but now I'm just sour. I want the joy back I want the pain gone. Can anyone help.

Oct 22, 2015 3:52 AM

You need to make a doctor appointment now. Tell him this. It sounds like depression but I am not a dr. If you are already on a anti depressant then it sounds like an adjustment is in order.

Oct 22, 2015 4:55 AM

I agree with shammagren. Mental health and pain are so very closely related. It is almost the standard of practice that anyone with a long term illness or chronic pain is put on an anti-depressant. Our brain chemicals get so out of whack when we our exposed to prolong sickness or pain. It becomes a chore to be happy. You are struggling against everything that is going on.. The way I have often described it to people for me. Maybe you feel the same. When I am in bad pain for so long, I would pray for 30 minute breaks every day. Those breaks would give me the strength and happiness to go on. It would refresh me. We need more then thirty minutes. Anti depressants help with pain because they change the way you think about pain. That is the same theory with narcotics. They don't remove pain. They make you think about pain differently. I give my best to you.

Oct 22, 2015 9:38 AM

Thank you guys.. I've been concerned about myentwl state . I really don't like the idea of anti depressants. I have a gp but he is an urgent care doctor and I limited on what he can diagnosis. Can a rheumatologist prescribe those things?

Oct 22, 2015 12:44 PM

I don't know if you live in the U.S but in most if not all counties, there are mental health clinics that are run by federal grant money. They provide services to everyone based on a sliding scale fee. So it just depends on how much you make. I know it is a hard thing to consider doing. But the medication can help bring back some joy to your life. It is worth seeking an opinion.

Oct 22, 2015 2:16 PM

Thank you profiler and shammagren I think some of my problem too is I'm out of my pain meds and I'm only two weeks post op. Plus I'm have cold flu symptoms. I just left an urgent care and they gave stuff for nausea and tummy upset. I actually did not mention my other concerns but he did order some test. But I'll make sure I mention things to my rheumatologist

Oct 22, 2015 6:03 PM

Newfibrogirl, Shammagren & Profiler are right. Depression has many faces, and it also rides along with major illnesses. Getting medication will help. You can ask they start you at the lowest dose and increase if needed following lab work. It's very hard to put on a smile and act as if nothing's wrong day in and day out. But party of dealing with our chronic pain is accepting that was can't do that, play OK. I would suggest focusing on trying to get through an hour at a time. And think of one thing that makes you feel joy every day, like hearing birds sing or watching children play.

I'm actually starting psychological counseling soon, as recommended by Mayo clinic. The doc there said I wasn't dealing with my chronic pain as well as I thought I was. So I talked to my psychiatrist and he said go ahead because it might help decrease my anxiety that's been increasing all summer. You know we are all here for you. Hugs and saying a prayer for you! 🙏🌼

Oct 25, 2015 8:39 AM

I would guess that anyone that has chronic pain has depression! It ebbs and flows at times, but at times it feels awful. The depression will make the pain worse, and the more pain will make the depression worse! It is a vicious cycle. There are May hospitals and other mental health counselors that offer pain management individual counseling support as well as group pain management support. Ask your doc if he knows of any.

Oct 25, 2015 8:39 AM

Ohh- and hang in there!!!!! I have been where you are and there will be a better day coming your way!

Oct 25, 2015 9:49 AM

Thank you everyone.I've got two more weeks to go til my appointment so please continue bto pray I make it.

Oct 25, 2015 9:50 AM

Right now I'm trying over the country. Stuff like Tylenol arthritis for my joint pain

Oct 25, 2015 9:56 AM

I just wanted to add that I see a therapist weekly for issues and can not believe how nice it is to unload on someone. I can be how it is not the i have to put on a happy face and pretend all is right with the world.

Oct 25, 2015 9:03 PM

I'm actually looking forward to starting my sessions in 2 weeks. 🙏🌼

Oct 27, 2015 10:29 PM

I feel like whenever I get sad I can get on here. I really don't like therapists. I'm sure I most likely need one, but I just don't like how some of them feel that going to college makes them best equipped to handle my life and it's issues, if that makes sense? The last therapist semi- involved in my life told my middle daughter, at the age of 18, that we (her parents) we too involved in her life and she needed to get a fresh start of her own and be an adult. Before this point she was going to work part time, live at home, and go to college. Because of his sage advice, she moved an hour away and turned her apartment into a revolving door of one night stands (because apparently that's what adults do) and spent so much time working 3 jobs that she failed out of college. Soooo. .. sometimes Mom and Dad DO know better. Btw, Mom did go to college.

Oct 28, 2015 1:02 AM

Serena no matter what you do as a parent children need to go sometime if they do good or not so good can happen at any age. All you can do is trust you taught them well, be there when they fall and love them. After highschool my daughter moved 4 hours away. The men in her life were her business I never asked. She worked 2 jobs and was in college. She ended up changing her mind about what she wanted to do with 1 year left to that important piece of paper and quit college. Believe me I explained what a piece of paper means regardless of it is for the job. She had to find her own path. She now is manager of a restaurant, not fast food. She still works 2 jobs because she likes the money. I remind her often I love her, she is amazing and probably not often enough that I am proud of her. Is it the path I wanted for her...no. did I know better on some of her choices...absolutely. each person has lessons that can only be learned for themselves no matter how much advice or lectures they get.

Oct 28, 2015 1:16 AM

I understand that, it just bothers me that his opinion meant so much more than mine just because he was a therapist. I think it had more to do with the men situation myself. In the meantime, I didn't mention this part earlier, the first roommate she had move in with her developed a crush on her and when she turned down his advances, he took a handgun, and because her bedroom door was locked, drove himself to the police station and shot himself in the chest and died... with a note blaming her for his death. He meant to shoot her as well, but darn it, her door was locked and he was drunk.... I just feel like a lot of this could have been avoided if she had just not gone to see the therapist. She has put herself through so much stress that was unnecessary because he put ideas in her head without ever meeting us. Every 17 - year-old thinks their parents are too involved! Psh! I bet he doesn't even have kids!

Oct 28, 2015 1:24 AM

I hope she got therapy for the suicide part. I avoided it for years then it came crashing down on me...I didn't go to a therapist but I married a guy when I was 17 because I thought I could save him until one day I realized I needed to save myself and left and filed for divorce. Two months later I was leaving a friend's house and when I turned on the headlights he stepped in front of the vehicle, mouthed the words I love you and shot himself in the head.

Oct 28, 2015 1:38 AM

No, she didn't. She insisted that that him killing himself was selfish and his own problem and had nothing to do with her. I couldn't even talk about it for months without crying for the thought of what if her door hadn't been locked? She doesn't think it's a big deal even now. I told her she just won't get it till she has her own baby. Never thought I would hear myself saying those words. Lol

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