Very interesting.... Martha Washington was a smart Lady and I have to say that I agree with her. Sometimes, though, even when we try to think positive and pull ourselves up by the bootstraps, about all we can manage it to wallow in self pity... I allow myself no more than 5 minutes to throw that pity party and then it's onwards and upwards. So, Now you heard it here, I'm off my soap box and going to check out how everyone is before I get up and try to get a shower... LOL!! Have a peaceful and less pain day all.. My thoughts and prayers are with you all
We're all bound to have pity parties now and then, especially when the health struggles close in on us. To me that doesn't mean we aren't positive thinkers. It just means we are ordinary humans. I know exactly what you're saying AlwayZ.
Eddieray, When I saw this quote I thought I'd copy it to share, but to also remind myself not to give in, or give up, or become negative. I don't want to be a "woe is me" person. I know some of those in my own family, and they deal with a lot less than anyone on this site. Hearing them complain all the time sucks the life right out of me! Lol Were all here to help each other through, lift us up, cry with us... I'm glad this is a picker upper.
Have a blessed no stress day. Cry or complain if you must. Know we're all here for each other. Were the best we can rely on & trust! 🙏🌼
I have to agree. Even when I feel s**t I try to think of positive things, to use humour and make people smile and feel special. I'm a million miles from perfect but my biggest fear about living a life with pain is to become bitter and twisted. I can't bear the thought of it. Good day and peace to u all. Enjoy the little things xx
You're right on that Alex76. It's days like I've had today (& various days over the past 2 weeks) that make me want to throw up my hands and say why do I even bother when the doctors have pretty much tucked tail and run in the opposite direction! Because in their opinion I'm a... "Difficult patient with too many issues." In other words I'm a challenge no one is willing to take a chance at helping me get better, even in the simple fixable things because they're afraid it will create more problems.
Then I kick myself and "I'm no quitter!". I to o am afraid of being negative permanently. No one likes to be around a sour puss very long... Right? 😉. So we'll help each other get through it. United we can stand but alone we will fall. 🙏🌼
Flappsy I hear you on the doctors. It always surprises me (and it doesn't) because I would think any doctor would be energized by a "difficult" case and the challenge of a medical puzzle. I know I would be and am for that matter but if I had gone through all that schooling and training a case that changes my brain and gives me the chance to help someone who no one has been able to, well that's what I would have gone into medicine for right? I just don't get why more professionals aren't anxious to work with puzzles like us and learn stretching their minds and experiential lessons along the way. It just doesn't seem like a profession people who want the same thing no surprises 9-5 check out kind of job would go into. But they keep proving that assumption of mine wrong. Also you would think that while they may not be great at expressing it (which is why they become surgeons goes the joke) shouldn't they at least have compassion? Once again I guess not. It's a shame and while certainly not the case across the board seems that way often to patients which in turn hurts those medical professionals that are compassionate, caring and curious.
Flappsy et all; I love the quote too but would submit that getting our complaints, frustrations out is taking care of ourselves and important. While we don't want to get eaten up or lost in it having a "pity party" as often as we need to is more than acceptable which is why I have such mixed feelings about the term. On the one hand we all know what we're talking about when we say we or someone else is having a pity party and making light of the term is often helpful and fitting, a lightening of the mood if you will. On the other hand the expression has such a negative connotation to the world in general that we are often admonishing ourselves on some level when applying it too. I don't have an answer other than making it a personal habit to never apply the expression to someone else unless they did first. But I still apply it to myself and I'm not in any way saying people shouldn't use it. I'm just sharing my thoughts and ambivalence with the term and my support for expressing and feeling...sorry for ourselves (geesh another pitfall expression)...why isn't there a safe non judgmental or "bad" expression for feeling unhappy with the cards you've been dealt or something in life in general? Humph
You know, Lymie, that is exactly the way I feel. With this parasite problem I am having. They are thinking I am so focused on the fact that I felt something moving. But there was so much much before that that was like a puzzle and in my research it just comes together so perfect. When it comes to parasites, doctors don't seem to know anything about them specifically but they are sure you don't have them. I have told them specific parts of the infection that I am feeling that I am experiencing, and I ask if they are familiar with what I am talking about, they have no idea. but they are sure I don't have it. Like you said, you would think they would enjoy the challenge. I have so much more respect for a doctor who would use three simple words. "I don't know" I would like them to accept of saying it can't be that because they don't know about the subject or they don't know a diagnosis based on your symptoms to just say I need to do some more research. I would rather them do that before passing me off to someone else because on this particular issue, very few know much. It is hard finding a true specialist on the issue
Sorry Flappy to get off subject. The saying you shared was wonderful. I think that is all in our best interest to stay as possitive as possible despite what we are going through. Especially if we want to live. The outlook we have affects so much how we physically feel and how long we live. Unlike, Alwayz, I am pathetic. I go many many days without being depressed and then I crash. And I will allow a day or two during a month to take several hours of my happiness. As far as disposition, I am sure I have much to work on. A good person, not I. But I am working on it as much as I can in my world. My worst disposition comes out to customer service people on the phone especially after my blood pressure boils after having to deal with their automated service for the first ten minutes. You know how you put in all your information and then you get them and then they ask you for all that information again and you are wondering what was the point of an automated service. And I hate the ones that try to have a conversation with you. Oh, I think I am giving you insight on my disposition. I really didn't want to do that. lol. I have issues.
I agree and understand what you're saying Lymie. I think the govt and insurance companies have such tight control over the doctors and hospitals, they just don't have the desire. There are regulations starting how long doctors can spend with a patient, one among many. Medical care is much worse than in the 1980-1990's. And providers didn't balk at a challenge.
As for the terms to use when feeling down, if and when the shoe fits, I wear it. I had a crying spell for about twenty minutes last night while telling my husband everything. I didn't really feel sorry for myself but more like feeling overwhelmed and frustrated that even he can't understand. Just this morning I asked him a question while we were making bfast. Not ten minutes later I asked the same question and he accused me of not listening. I snapped at him, "I was listening but I forgot your answer!" He apologized but I've been this way over two years and it's getting worse. They diagnosed dementia and I'm 53. What will I be like at 63? Six months ago I could walk anywhere I wanted, if I had rest stops. Riding has been an issue for two years. Now I'm on a cane and/or walker. And big stores I use the carts. People look at me funny until they see my tremors. Yesterday I couldn't make the gas pump work and had to ask a man for help... I forgot to choose my has grade ! Did I cry? Yes and I laughingly call it a pity party but maybe I should come up with a new term. After all, I started a new club for a different diet... "FATS" Club... Feeding All The Stress!😋
Profiler, I don't think you have a bad disposition. We all lose our cool from time to time. And I hate automated customer services!!! Your way of writing shows you r personality. Stop worrying and join the FATS club! Just be careful what soothes the tongue doesn't settle on the hips! Lol 😉
I'll go with the Ice Cream please... and I'd like chocolate syrup, whipped cream and rainbow sprinkles... (May as well go all the way right??? LOL!!!) I know what you mean, Flappsy... I go to big stores and need to be the one to push the wagon or I can't walk the entire store. I used to walk everywhere and I used to go out each and every day and night and work in between. I would come home from being out just in time to take a shower and go to work and then I'd come home, have dinner and head out again. All weekend I would spend at the barn with my horses and I would muck stalls and then groom, clean paddocks and then tack up and head out for a two hour or more ride. Then come back, groom again and put my girl in her stall for the night to come back and see her in the morning before I went to work. I am absolutely dying to go and throw a leg over a horse again. It is the one thing in my life that ever really brought me true joy. I am sure if I went, it would take several days for me to even begin feeling better. I want to buy another horse one day, even if I can't ride. I can adopt a companion horse that needs a good home and then I can just love on him and groom him and spend time with him enjoying the beauty and smell of him. Today is Sunday and its sunny and warm (although humid). I've already had my shower, I'm going to head out in the backyard and sit on the couch and read and enjoy the fresh air. Then I think i am going to go over and visit my 98 year old Godfather across the street and make sure he is doing well. I think I'll bring him some cookies... He likes them and it will make his day. So, that's my mission for the day.. I hope that you all have a wonderful, peaceful and less painful day.... You are all in my thoughts and prayers. (By the way, I had my pity party for the day at 4am so I'm done with that for the day... Now, it's time for SMILES!!) :c)